Archives for Health

Addictive Relating

The Neuroscience of Why a Child is a Model Citizen, 2 of 2

Luis Sarabia via Compfight

In Part 1 we looked at better understanding the behavior of a child who is a model citizen everywhere but home by examining what inner strivings, or emotion-drives, the child is attempting to meet in each situation. In this post, the two areas below pertain to questions of how thoughts drive behaviors.
2. What beliefs (or thoughts) does the child's behavior say the child has learned to hold regarding how to best fulfill their core...
Continue Reading

Addictive Relating

20 Situations in Which a Man Tends to “Gaslight” a Woman (To Get Her to Think She’s Crazy)


It's not usual for a woman to hear the words "you're crazy" from the man in her life.

Don't believe it for a moment, says Bashar Ali in a recent article, A Message to Women From a Man: You Are Not “Crazy."

Of course most women know it's not “crazy" to want closeness or to express hurt feelings, at least deep down; it's refreshing however to read an article written by a member of the male sex talking about his own...
Continue Reading

Conscious Lifestyle

10 Affirmations and Inspirational Quotes for New Beginnings Each Day and Year!



Happy New Year to you and yours!

(Or, if you prefer, Happy First Day of the Rest of Your Life)!

In either case, why not make it an inspiring one?

Start this New Year, and each day in it, with affirming thoughts and words that have amazing powers to refresh and literally restore balance in the neurochemistry of your brain and body, mind and heart!

This shouldn't be surprising, considering that human beings are hardwired to have an intimate relationship with words. That's right. You and language...
Continue Reading

Addictive Relating

Tactics of Stonewalling and Gas Lighting, What Are They? How Do They Differ? 1 of 2

As defensive approaches to communication, stonewalling and gas lighting share a few common traits.

They both: (1) block healthy communication between two persons; (2) are indirect attempts to gain the love or cooperation or attention of the other; and (3) erode or prevent the couple from deepening their connection to one another.

They are distinctly different, however, although one may use stonewalling without gas lighting, gas lighting often includes stonewalling elements.

What distinguishes one from the other is their...
Continue Reading

Emotional Mastery

A New Year’s Gift: Four Realities In “Re-Storying” Your Life to Realize Your Goals and Dreams



The cusp a New Year is a great time to reflect, and yes to dream big, connecting to your heart’s deepest yearnings -- what you want to see, create and choose to bring ever closer into your life in the coming year.

Setting goals is great exercise, proven to make a difference, especially if you use research-based approaches, such as setting “smart" goals. There’s another exercise to consider, however: Re-storying "the story" of your life....
Continue Reading

Emotional Mastery

14 Tips to Survive — and Enjoy — the Holidays

The holidays can be stressful, but they don't have to be unnecessarily so! Remember, you always have a choice to create more peace of mind by accessing inner power to conscious pay attention to what you're focusing on with your thoughts.  This involves clarifying what you most value, and cultivating the practice of disallowing things of less value to compete. It can be fun!

Here are a few tips:
Make meaningful moments by letting go of...
Continue Reading

Conscious Lifestyle

7 Tips to Become a Highly Effective Listener

Do you want to enhance or repair a relationship with someone you love? Be known as a good leader at work? Listening is the key.

Here are 7 tips to cultivate your listening ability, and become highly effective in building rapport:
1. Breathe
Concentrate on your breath; this connects your mind and body and helps you listen mindfully with your senses, more fully engaged, therefore taking in more information, such as the other person's...
Continue Reading

Addictive Relating

Rebuilding Trust: A Letter to Help Heal Your Relationship After Infidelity, 1 of 2

Informed by clinical research, as well as examples from the author's practice and personal experience, in the book After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful, Dr. Janis Abrahms Spring, , an expert on issues of trust, fidelity, and forgiveness, outlines specific steps partners can take to heal their relationship, and rather than give in to despair, grow and thrive as individuals and partners from the shattering crisis of infidelity.

One...
Continue Reading

Addictive Relating

What Is and Isn’t Narcissism: 3 Key Identifiers, 2 of 5

Many articles of late describe a narcissist as someone "in love" with themselves, absorbed with activities that promote their success, dreams and goals, skilled at charming others, attention seeking, and so on. Though a narcissist may exhibit these traits, and be charming, charismatic, successful and goal-oriented ... let's get real.

These characteristics, in and of themselves, are also essential human traits and, in varying degrees, describe behaviors of healthy persons who are driven to succeed in their careers at work or home,...
Continue Reading

Addictive Relating

How to Identify a Narcissist In Family or Couples Counseling

How does a therapist identify a narcissist in therapy? In general, a therapist "knows" because of how much time and energy it takes to manage simple therapy processes. They come dictating the terms; letting you know they need to be in control, and want things done "their" way. 

And, if you're in family or couples counseling, how does a family member recognize them? How about you? Do you display narcissistic tendencies in a therapy session?

Continue Reading