Commitment

Fierce Warrior Meets the Spiritual Teacher

Establishing some heaven on earth. Linda: Long ago, there lived a fierce warrior who had gone bad and turned to thievery and destruction. He was the terror of the land. Strong men quaked in fear at the mention of his name. Whole villages would be evacuated when he and his men rode into town. All who dared challenge him were soundly defeated. Over the years, he amassed great wealth resulting form his plundering and looting. Yet, despite his massive accumulation of wealth, he was unhappy.
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General

Disclosure Trumps Withholding-Part 2

Disclosure invites disclosure. There is no way to force someone to talk about himself or herself. We can only invite by taking risks ourselves. Enjoying the transparency of another is earned by building the trust to the point where the other knows that their revelations will be treated with great respect. And they trust into the certainty that their disclosures will be met with reciprocity with a similar depth and breath of disclosure.
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Commitment

Disclosure Trumps Withholding Almost Every Time-Part 1

“A hallmark of a healthy creative culture is that its people feel free to share ideas, opinions, and criticisms. Lack of candor, if unchecked ultimately leads to dysfunctional environments.” - Ed Catmull in Creativity, Inc. Linda: Reveal don’t conceal; express don’t repress; accept don’t reject; connect don’t protect, and open don’t close, are good guidelines when committing to a partnership characterized by a high level of trust and closeness. There are so many couples where the lack of emotional intimacy compromises their sense of well-being.
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Commitment

The Art of Negotiation- Part 2

Linda: So many people now are refusing to enter into this formally recognized union of marriage because they have negative associations with the institution. What if what’s true is that the institution of marriage isn’t the problem at all, but how people define it. For decades, family and community dictated what the roles of husband and wife must be, and most people conformed to those expectations. There was a certain comfort, security, and safety that came with...
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Commitment

Mastering The Art of Negotiation-Part 1

Linda: We live in a time of great cynicism about marriage. Everyone knows a friend or family member who married with great enthusiasm and love, whose relationship turned sour, ultimately ending in a bitter divorce. A multitude of people are deciding that to prevent such a painful scenario, filled with grief and heartache, they won’t get married in the first place.

But it may not be the institution of marriage itself that is at fault here, but the...
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Commitment

This Could Be The Biggest Threat to Your Relationship

Charlie: It’s often referred to as ‘the invisible addiction’ because it flies under the radar. Unlike alcoholism, drug addiction, or hoarding, this addiction is not only almost impossible for an outsider to recognize, but it’s viewed by most of the population as being valuable, even, worthy of admiration. And it’s rewarded with praise, money, and a variety of other benefits. There’s only one problem with it: it’s a killer. It’s been known to destroy health (physical...
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Commitment

14 Ways to Cultivate Empathy

An antidote to being judgmental.
Linda: Some people are under the false impression that empathy is something that you either have or you don’t. They don't understand that empathy can be learned. Of course, some people are naturally more empathic than others, but there is huge room for development if there is motivation to do so. There are many good reasons to commit to the practice of becoming more empathic; one of the most important one being...
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Commitment

Empathy Makes All the Difference-Part 1

The better we listen, the less defensive our partner will be. Linda: Empathy is defined as “the psychological identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another.” Empathy results from understanding another deeply. When we look at the world from our partner’s point of view, we begin to bridge the gap of understanding between us. When we are emotionally activated by tension, fear, and anger, it is extremely difficult to empathize with and understand the other’s perspective at first. We are too wrapped up in our own sensations and thoughts to think clearly.
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Commitment

Post Traumatic Growth

“All the world is full of suffering. It is also full of overcoming.” --Helen Keller Linda: Researchers have studied people facing all kinds of adversity: loss of children, spouses and parents, loss of health due to cancer, heart disease, paralysis, HIV, rape, assault, mental illness, war zones, plane crashes, divorce, infertility, domestic violence, betrayal, imprisonment, torture, natural disasters (earth quakes, fire, flood,
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