While soaking in all of this information might help to make me more certain, it definitely jars my nerves.
There wasn’t a single place I could go during a rainstorm and feel safe. There wasn’t a single place in that damn office where I could allow my panicky feelings to de-escalate.
Each downpour filled the entire office with an ambient white noise that spiked my adrenaline level. When it rained, I couldn’t sit still.
The other week, I finally bought some light-blocking curtains for the bedroom. (“Helps reduce stress and improve sleep!” boasted the plastic package.) Glad to finally have a dark room to retreat to, I drew the curtains shut. Save the light of the alarm clock, I was in near complete darkness. Ahhhh. Perfect.
For about five seconds or so.