Do you want to eliminate all obstacles in the way of your goals?
You can. I’m going to show you how, right here and now. In fact, you’re going to punch failure right in the face and knock it out.
Self-sabotage: the truly nasty tendency to do the very thing that hurts you.
Building strong relationships with others is essential in all areas of our lives: business, friendships, dating, parenting, etc. However, our daily word choices can undermine our attempts at getting closer to other people.
We can unwittingly be marking ourselves as untrustworthy, judgmental, and belittling when we use the following words in our everyday interactions.
Language is important! Beware how you use the following words…
Throw out convention.
It’s time for some counter-intuitive tips to increase your self-esteem.
These self-esteem tips work. And they will work for you if you practice them with an open mind.
One of the hallmarks of healthy self-esteem is self-respect. Self-respect involves accepting and honoring every part of you. Let’s stop pretending that our darker natures don’t exist and begin to respect ourselves on every level.
The following tips will move you squarely in that direction.
According to research, 40% of people’s daily routines are habitual. Built over a lifetime of repetition, these habits seem to occur almost on their own.
Wiping your shoes on the mat; drinking coffee in the morning; having a cigarette while talking on the phone. Little things, like which sock you put on first, to locking your car doors, are habitual traits that require no conscious effort.
At the American Psychological Association’s 122nd Annual Convention, Wendy Wood gave an in-depth explanation about how habitual patterns work, as well as how to break them. She gives insight into why many diet fads and self-help books don’t work, as well as measures people take to make positive changes from old habits.
The human mind is an intricate marvel of complexity and adaptability. Yet there are undertakings that seem relatively easy to some people, but prove to be a tremendous challenge to others.
What determines if a new task is easy or difficult to learn? In NLP, we draw on existing, familiar, internal resources and apply them to the currently learning process. The following research reveals that this is a good strategy.
To increase happiness, you may need to think outside the box. What follows are four ways we commonly deprive ourselves of happiness. They usually occur on autopilot, without conscious choice.
Once we understand them, we can take actions to remedy the negative effects.
Here they are:
Squashing positive emotions that naturally surface throughout the day is shockingly common. In fact, research reveals that suppressing positive emotions is a common yet little-known cause of depression.
This is actually good news. It means that you do have spontaneous positive emotions that surface regularly. If you learn to avoid chasing them away, then these uplifting emotions might stick around longer.
Pay attention to when you feel positive emotions wanting to rise. Then allow yourself to feel them!
The late Nathaniel Branden called it happiness anxiety. It happens when you become nervous after a period of feeling happy. Many people subconsciously believe that happiness can never last. Something will always come along to ruin it.
So, they preempt the bad news by ditching happiness before they are inevitably hurt or disappointed. It’s sort of like breaking up with someone because you’re afraid they’re going to break up with you.
When you’re feeling happy, reassure yourself that if bad news comes, you can deal with it. Until then, allow yourself to enjoy it!
Some of us stay too distracted and busy to enjoy much of anything. Happiness seems to be related to slowing down.
Making too many commitments, endless to-do lists, lack of personal boundaries (can’t say no), obsession with your electronic device – all of these distractions may be direct obstacles to your inner state of happiness.
There’s no better way to destroy happiness than to criticize yourself. And the relentlessness of it for some of us is astounding. Self-criticism prevents happiness. And it obliterates any happiness that might slip through the cracks.
Self-criticism may …
In a recent voluntary survey on willpower, 85% of participants reported an increase in willpower through a free, 5-day online willpower boot camp conducted via email.
As of this writing, 121 people have participated in the online willpower course. Updates may be posted at intervals as more data is acquired from future participants.
Participants registered for the course on a voluntary basis and paid no fee. For five consecutive days, participants received an email that asked them to report their results. A final survey delivered the results show below.
Imagine being in a community of people where social conformity demanded being genuine in the extreme, not fake.
In fact, we’d have to call this community “twisted” according to our standards.
In a community of Twisted Ones, you have to speak the truth about what you really want and where your deepest motivation lies. And it is never a mystery.
Discovering what you want is as simple as looking at what results you have produced.
What if you did more, however, than muster what you’ve got?
This article contains systematic steps to increase your willpower far beyond what you’d expect under typical circumstances. Just read and follow the steps.
If you come to believe this will help you, you can also register free of charge to be guided through the following steps over a period of five days with the iNLP Center 5-Day Willpower Boot Camp.
Here are the steps!
Photo credit: Josh Fults
Be warned: This is twisted stuff. You may be tempted to think I am a crazy fool for writing such things. I may be. But when you look out at the world – or at yourself – and see people willingly doing all manner of behaviors that create personal misery, you must consider that we need an explanation beyond conventional wisdom.