Archives for Beliefs


5 Steps to a Sincere Apology that Works

Most of us were taught to apologize, but did we really learn how to do it effectively?

Apologies can fall short for a lot of reasons. On your side of the equation, learning how to apologize well (with completeness) may help restore peace and connection with others.

How to apologize well involves doing five things:

1) Confess
2) Say the words: I apologize
3) Demonstrate you understand (with specifics)...
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20 Ways People Deny their Own Wrongdoing

Some of these ways to deny wrongdoing are direct denials.

Others are some are downright subtle. Still, each and every example below is an attempt to avoid responsibility.

Interestingly, denial comes so naturally to all of us. Denial doesn't take sophisticated communication skills.

In fact it seems to require no effort at all!

1. Blame someone else.

Not my fault! Someone else is the cause of my behavior.

2. Blame self.

It’s not my fault…this is how I was created,...
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What To Do When You Make Mistakes

The first step is to realize humans are mistake-making machines. This is merely a fact that has nothing to do with self-esteem.

Both high and low self-esteem individuals make similar mistakes.

Those with low self-esteem tend to self-criticize when they make mistakes. Higher self-esteem folks tend to accept mistakes as part of life.

So, don't self-criticize, if you can help it. We're all that's that.

If you cannot help but criticize yourself, then you should look into self-sabotage and...
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How To Build Confidence When You Don’t Feel Any At All

Guest post by Jessica Sweet

It was 11 o’clock on a Monday morning when the call came in and Paula’s stomach clenched. She knew who was on the other end.

She picked up the phone carefully, but she could already hear her boss yelling.

It made her want to tell her boss to stop, and set a clear, professional limit. Instead, she listened meekly. . .

Matthew sat in the conference room as everyone else battled for...
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How to Stay Focused on the Positive Without Living in Fantasy

Summary: How can you stay focused on the positive when negativity is real?

Research suggests that focusing on positive outcomes correlates with self-esteem, but it would be foolish to deny that negative outcomes are possible. What's the solution?

According to an article titled Low Self Esteem published by Simply Psychology:

Research has shown key differences between individuals with high and low self-esteem. For example, people with high self-esteem focus on growth and improvement, whereas people with low self-esteem focus...
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Weight Loss Adversity: Not Caring

An example of Seligman's ABCDE Method as applied to lacking of motivation for weight loss.

The ABCDE Method for overcoming adversity and altering limiting beliefs can be used as a journal exercise to support daily weight-loss efforts.

Take out a piece of paper. Write down the words: adversity, beliefs, consequences, dispute, and energize.

Then, begin to journal. Use the following sample as a guide.

Adversity: If I am 100% honest, I am not feeling motivated to do what I...
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An Awesome Reversal for People with a ‘Rough Past’

In NLP we call it a reframe - the altering of meaning.

Most of us understand that we don't see the world as it is, but as we are. Theoretically, we have a choice in determining what things mean.

However, few of us consciously alter how we see the world. NLP reframing offers the tools to do that.

Here's an example from an iNLP Center student who was learning about reframing meaning. She'd had...
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Anxiety: Give it Over to God?

Some humanists would do just about anything to get rid of anxiety, as long as it does not involve giving it over to God.

Even though believers regularly report greater happiness and satisfaction in their lives, non-believers tend to stand on principle, refusing to believe in something so irrational as a Supreme Being.

In return, atheists and agnostics can cite their own pile of research to suggest religious folks are maladjusted psychologically.

And the debate goes...
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Do You Hate Talking about your Anxiety?

Of course you want to put a lid on your anxiety. Stuff it back down where it came from. You do NOT want to talk about your anxiety, to open up. But why not?

Because you fear talking about it might somehow empower your anxiety - make it more real - and you do not want it to get any stronger, go out of control and completely take over your life.

Besides, if people only...
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How to Get a Verbal Abuser to Stop Abusing You

Getting a verbal abuser to stop abusing you is one of those topics that is simple and complicated at the same time.

On the simple side of the matter, it's pretty clear. ZERO VERBAL ABUSE. That's the rule. Whoever cannot keep that rule does not have a place in your life. Done.

If you abuse me, you don't get to be with me, period. Simple!

One the more complicated side of getting a verbal abuser...
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