Archives for Beliefs

Beliefs

How to Get a Verbal Abuser to Stop Abusing You

Getting a verbal abuser to stop abusing you is one of those topics that is simple and complicated at the same time.

On the simple side of the matter, it's pretty clear. ZERO VERBAL ABUSE. That's the rule. Whoever cannot keep that rule does not have a place in your life. Done.

If you abuse me, you don't get to be with me, period. Simple!

One the more complicated side of getting a verbal abuser...
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Beliefs

Three Tips for People Who Grew Up with Non-Supportive Parents

Some parents really are loving, supportive, communicative and wise.

Other parents lack basic communication skills and honestly don't care about their children. Many parents fall somewhere in between.

Still, other parents are supportive and loving as long as their children go along with their agenda.

This can work as long as the kids are interested in becoming what their parents want them to be. Otherwise, it's hardly fair.

If you land into adulthood with a feeling that...
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Beliefs

How to Recognize your True Self

You probably already believe it's wise to 'just be yourself', but how do you know when you are?

It's not like your brain has a true/false sensor that beeps when you're being untrue, right?

And in one sense, there's no possible way for you to not be yourself. You're just you; the good, bad, and the phony. And so it is with me.

Still, we should all learn to recognize that special space inside...
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Beliefs

When You Lack Motivation, Remember This!

There are different kinds of motivation, but one particular type of motivation keeps working for you when all others fail - even when you're discouraged.

I was reminded of this recently when reading Jen Gresham’s post, 7 Unexpected Reasons You’re Not Living Up To Your Potential. The kind of motivation I’m referring to is known as intrinsic motivation. If you don’t know what it is, you’ve got to learn.

If you already know what...
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Beliefs

12 Self-Respecting, Supportive Things to Say to Yourself Today

Our best friend and our worst enemy reside within us. Unfortunately, most of us access the latter far more often than the former.  ―Maddy Malhotra

I’m often amazed at how easy it is to be unhappy.

Discontent, resentment and feelings of victimization don’t seem to require any special effort or circumstance. All you need to do is passively allow them into your life.

Most of the time we get into these unfortunate states on autopilot, as...
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Beliefs

Four Ways Your Perception of Others Can Ruin Your Life

How you perceive others has everything to do with your own mental well-being.

This article will show you why this is the case and offer suggestions to improve your moods.

The Austrian philosopher Martin Buber may have been the first to point out the not-so-obvious: Our perception of others has everything to do with self-perception.

How you feel about yourself - moment to moment - is inseparably tied to how you view others.

When...
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Beliefs

Five Areas of Emotional Health That Can Make or Break You

Let's take a look at the issues that can make or break your emotional health. There are five areas to consider today.

1. Awareness of feelings


A common problem with emotional self-awareness might be expressed this way:

Even though I am capable of feeling my feelings and following them - in the practical process of everyday communication, I am on autopilot too much. Being on autopilot encourages glossing over feelings or denying them.

Still, I know...
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Beliefs

Note to Self: Remember How to Be YOU Today

Dear Self,

Since there is no way you can be anyone else today, remember to consciously be yourself.

Keep the following pointers in mind so that you can have the experience of being simply you.

1. Of course you will notice others and compare yourself to them. This is natural. However, you don't need to compare yourself negatively. Other people are other people. You are you. Simple.

2. Pay deeper attention to feelings....
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Beliefs

How to Get Through a Typical Bad Day

Today’s the day I remind myself that I am not immune from suffering.

Why should I be?

I’m a person and people suffer from time to time; sometimes for a long, long time.

Shit happens and when I find myself in the midst of it, pretending it shouldn’t be happening doesn’t help.

Most of my suffering comes not from what happens in the world outside of me, but from my childish belief that it shouldn’t be...
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