I thought it would be interesting to use Ahref.com’s new content explorer to find the most shared happiness articles in the last 12 months.
This cool new search engine identifies the web’s top content based on quantity of social media shares.
There are some real gems in here. If you’re in pursuit of happiness, you’ll want to check these out. FYI of the top 20 articles, I chose the top six that had to do with personal happiness (not workplace or other areas of happiness).
John Corcoran over at the Art of Manliness generated a ton of social shares with his excellent run-down of how he learned to break the ice with strangers and start up conversations. This is a real-life account that is packed full of experience. Did he find greater happiness through connection? Check it out.
Rodolphe over at BufferApp took a 100-day happiness challenge on Facebook. His goal was to post a daily picture of something that he felt happy about. He almost didn’t do it, until he read that most people made the excuse that they were ‘too busy.” Too busy to be happy? Read all about his 100-day challenge.
Forbes writer Jayson DeMers gives us the straight dope on what it takes to be happy. Are you up for it?
Marc and Angel have done it again. Their catchy titles and genuine content keep readers coming back. You can’t go wrong with these seven recommendations.
LifeHacker.com surprises us with a blatant challenge to the classic maxim that money doesn’t buy happiness. In this piece, they lay out the purchases that are most likely to …
This short video reveals the oh-so-simple thing you can do right now to increase your happiness.
You’ll thank me later.
You’ll get it in the first 30 seconds. Then, watch the amazing results unfold over the next few minutes. At the end, be prepared for mind-blower!
Warm fuzzies? Sure.
But if you’re like me, you might stop short of actually doing it yourself. Well, I beat my negative nature this time and did the exercise all the way through. Amazing. It really is so simple. Why don’t you try it?
Now, to live this way every day, overcome the self-sabotaging tendencies to avoid happiness, that is the real trick.
By Mike Bundrant of the iNLP Center.
Disclaimer: By writing this article, I do not suggest that what I am calling emotional masochism is necessarily a conscious choice.
I also do not claim that it is anyone’s fault. I believe it may be part of human nature with origins that pre-date the average person’s conscious awareness.
In my experience, becoming aware of emotionally masochistic tendencies for what they are is a rare phenomenon, even though such tendencies appear to be common.
Defined as the enjoyment of what appears to be painful or tiresome, masochism seems quite a stretch for most people.
Have you realized that you need to consciously allow another person to love you?
If you’re not used to being loved, your default position may be to push people away. For example, a reader recently wrote:
I got really close to someone, then I did what I always do, I found the nearest exit and sprinted away to the single life.
Been doing this forever. As soon as the other person really loves me, I fight, flee or freeze.
In my family, I never felt good enough and always failed to make my parents proud. Feeling unloved and trusting very few people, I find it’s easier to stand alone.
Vulnerability goes against my grain, so when I do fall in love, I never let it last long. For the life of me, I can’t let someone love me!
How do you stop resisting and allow someone to love you?
Disclaimer: Although the title to this post sounds like personal growth hype, it isn’t. The scientific research cited is legitimate. The real life application discussed at the end of the article may prove very helpful, but contains a flaw, as you will gather from my self-reported experiments.
If you could push a button in your brain and rewire your bad circuitry, would you?
There isn’t such a button. However, altering beliefs comes close. In fact, beliefs alone have been shown to regulate brain chemistry. Groups of people holding different beliefs exhibit very different brain activity in response to the same chemical.
Your feelings are hurt.
What you do at this point could make the difference between resolution and even more hurt feelings.
Take the wrong turn and your feelings will continue to be trampled upon. Your relationship will suffer, according to research.
Take the right turn and you have a chance – a real chance at resolution. Take the right turn consistently and you could have one of the healthiest, mutually satisfying relationships on the planet.
If something went wrong, I was the point of failure. Failure was internal, an inevitable part of who I was. I did not know I was seeing myself as failure. If I had known, I might have been able to question what I was doing.
At any rate, this unconscious view was draining. Life was a burden and I was the donkey.
Now, I see failure in one of two ways:
As in – “I gave it my best effort and did not accomplish my goal.” For example, you might run your very best race and someone simply runs faster than you. You failed to win. You lost because you did not have the ability to run fast enough to win that particular race against that particular person.
This is a kind of failure to deal with realistically and accept. You did your best. What did you learn? How can you adapt? What is there to celebrate?
When you can say, “I put forth my best effort. I gave it my all and lost,” it hurts. But this hurt is very, very different than the self-imposed failure of self-sabotage. You can ultimately recover and live with no regrets when you know you’ve done your best.
I sometimes indulge in this one – an attitude that prevents me from running my best race and letting the chips fall where they may. This attitude is full of excuses, as if I am trying to justify losing so I can indulge in feeling bad.
With this kind of failure, I am finding that it is most useful to visualize it as a little green monster and punch it right in the face. It is not who I am. It’s an attitude. I can symbolize this attitude that doesn’t represent who I really am – in the form of a little green monster. It’s super goofy, yes. But …
Is it inner conflict that holds you back?
Inner conflict can stop you in your tracks and keep you preoccupied with all the wrong things. Rather than produce real, rewarding results in the world, inner conflict would have you spin out on your inner dynamics.
One of the keys to overcoming inner conflict and it’s frustrating symptoms is to identify it. You cannot resolve inner conflict intentionally until you know how it operates in your psyche.
Toward that end, here are three sure signs of inner conflict.
The big obvious sign of inner conflict is that you have a critical inner voice that opposes what you consciously want. The voice tells you things like:
You’re an idiot for thinking you can do that.
You’re going to fail.
You’ll never amount to anything.
Here’s the scenario: You want something. You have an inner voice that appears to oppose what you want. This is a sure sign of inner conflict.
When you set goals, it makes perfect sense to keep a positive attitude, overcome obstacles and keep going until you get there.
Some of us, however, quit goals too easily. We may suddenly stop trying, “forget” to do what we need to do, or even doubt that it was a good idea in the first place. Quitting goals is another sign that you are conflicted about what you really want.
You find yourself saying something like, “On the one hand I want this, but on the other hand I want that. Inner conflict such as this can make decision-making brutal. In fact, it can halt the process entirely, leaving you spinning on your conflict indefinitely.
1. Acknowledge it.
2. Identify any elements of self-sabotage.
3. Communicate with your inner parts to find out what they want.
4. Find resolution through negotiation with yourself.
5. Look for opportunities to fail, then Punch Failure in the Face! I know this last step may seem odd – but this attitude of not accepting …
If it weren’t for twisted logic, life might be too boring for many of us.
Most people I know, myself included, have a knack for twisting the truth. And some of the time that little twist is a perfect happiness block.
What follows are 27 examples of how you can prevent the happiness that might have been yours. All it takes is a tiny, twisted whisper in your mind.
1. When I am happy, bad news is coming, because happiness can’t last.
2. When I am happy, I am setting myself up for disappointment.
3. When I am happy, people expect more of me.
4. When I am happy, I have no excuse to be lazy.
5. When I am happy, I am letting my negligent parents off the hook.
6. When I am happy, it will draw too much attention to me.
7. When I am happy, I’ll have to be nice to people I don’t like.
8. When I am happy, I am deluding myself.
Do you want to eliminate all obstacles in the way of your goals?
You can. I’m going to show you how, right here and now. In fact, you’re going to punch failure right in the face and knock it out.
Self-sabotage: the truly nasty tendency to do the very thing that hurts you.