12 Funny New Year’s Resolution Quotes for Curmudgeons
So, for me, the new year’s resolution opportunity is no different than any other time of the year.
So, I like to poke fun at resolutions – not to discourage anyone who is feeling particularly resolute – but to have fun and realize that every day is a day to resolve anew, then screw up, then resolve again and keep moving two steps forward, one step back, two steps forward…
Here are 12 funny quotes about new year’s resolutions!
An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.
Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average… which means, you have met your New Year’s resolution.
New Year’s Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time.
My new years resolution for 2014? I will be less laz
May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions!
He who breaks a resolution is a weakling. He who makes one is a fool.
Quotes by Anonymous
Dear God, my prayer for 2014 is a fat bank account and a thin body. Please don’t mix these up like you did last year.
A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one Year and out the other.
This year let’s resolve to make better bad decisions.
My excuses for already failing my New Year’s resolution are more complicated than the fiscal cliff deal.
For my new year’s resolution, I promise to stop correcting your terrible spelling and focus more on your horrific grammar.
My New Year’s resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year’s resolutions.
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Mike Bundrant is the author of Your Achilles Eel: Discover and Overcome the Hidden Source of Negativity, Bad Decisions and Self-Sabotage. Click here to learn more.
Bundrant, M. (2014). 12 Funny New Year’s Resolution Quotes for Curmudgeons. Psych Central. Retrieved on September 4, 2015, from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/nlp/2014/01/12-harsh-new-years-resolution-quotes-for-curmudgeons/