Archives for compassion

Anxiety

A Classic Natural Anti-Depressant Practice

Everyone at some point in their life will be affected by depression whether it's their own or someone they are close to. Almost 19 million Americans alone have periods where they feel a lack of pleasure or interest their usual activities combined with feeling tired and heavy, potentially overly emotional or numb, and an onslaught of negative and self defeating thoughts that can keep invading the mind over and over again. The more periods of this depressed mood we have in life, the more likely we are to fall back into them again. Why does this relapse occur and how can mindfulness offer hope? Falling into a depression feels traumatic and just like getting bit by a dog causes us to be fearful of and oversensitive to dogs, our minds and bodies become oversensitive to associations with the depression causing us to react to any sign of it. Feeling low mood is normal for everyone, but if we've experienced depression in the past, this may be a trigger for thinking depression is about to set in again. If we feel tired or if we notice sadness, the mind pops up with the worry "uh oh, that is how I felt when I was
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compassion

A 7 Step Meditation to Start Your (Earth) Day!

We're wired to take things for granted and this earth that sustains and supports us all is no exception. It's quite wonderful that we have a day to celebrate the earth and at the same time it would be even more wonderful if we could wake up with that awareness every day. The implicit connection and gratitude associated with it are associated with resiliency and well-being. Drop your shoulders, settle in, here is a meditation for the Earth... enjoy! 7 Step Meditation to Start Your (Earth) Day First, start off by sitting in a comfortable position, close your eyes, and take a few deep breaths. Consider what the world needs more of - More kindness, reverence for nature, protecting life on this planet, thriving wildlife and rainforests that continue to produce beauty for our eyes and oxygen to survive. Consider what the world needs less of - Global stress, human disconnection, over consumption, over fishing, world hunger, maybe pollution. Sense your connection to this planet - Remember you were born on this planet and it is this very planet that sustains you. and how you will eventually be released back to the earth.
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Anxiety

Stop the Glorification of Busy and Give Yourself Permission to Be Happy

It's as if someone from the outside has decided to play a cruel joke on a large segment of humanity. From the outside looking in they're saying, "Let's turn up the dial and increase the speed of life for these humans and see how much they can take before they naturally combust." We've fallen into a trance of sorts where there's some warped shared understanding that to be busy means we are productive members of society, needed and important. This is supposed to then make us feel good, but at  the end of the day it comes with a terrible expense - increased stress, anxiety, depression, cellular inflammation and less time, value for play and taking care of ourselves. The reality is, if we want to increase the general well-being of our culture we need to stop the glorification of busy. Can we begin to accept that it's also okay to lead a calmer and more joyful life? Can we practice and learn to see others who are doing this, taking time for themselves, playing and finding enjoyment in life and rather than meeting them with judgment, practice seeing their joy and being happy for their happiness? Ask yourself, what would the days, weeks and months ahead be like if there were more people who were encouraging of and genuinely happy for the good moments you experience in life? How would that make you  feel? And how would it make you feel if you felt genuinely happy for
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Anger

Before You Speak, Consider These Words…

We’ve all experienced it. It’s the moment we say something and as the last syllables leave our lips our brain has figured out we put our foot in our mouths and reaches to take them back, but it’s too late. The fact is we often time don’t think before we speak. Our words become actions and actions become consequences. Unfortunately the consequences land us in relationship problems, a blown business deal, or just the general reinforcement of unhealthy mind traps. But what if I told you there’s a way to fix this. Just consider, what would the days, weeks and months ahead look like if before we all spoke we considered three questions: Is it true? Is it necessary? Is it kind? These a questions that one might say are inspired by the world’s wisdom traditions and have great relevance to our relationships in our families, friendships, business, and education today. In this emerging world where we’re quick to fire off texts, tweets, Snapchats and Facebook messages, it might be more important than ever to
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Altruism

Practice the Change You Wish to See in the World

Life is a practice and what you choose to practice is what will make up your character. It's worth considering what you value in life and then making an intention and plan to live alongside those values. This is the direct back to living Ghandi's words, "Be the change that you wish to see in the world." Consider how simple it really is: If you want to be more grateful in life, practice being grateful. If you want to be confident, practice confidence. If you want to be more mindful, practice mindfulness. If you want to be more loving, practice loving yourself and others. If you want to be more forgiving and let go of stress-laden emotional burdens, practice forgiveness. If you want to live essential happiness ingredients such as compassion and generosity, practice compassion and generosity. With this said, no one said it's going to be easy. We are all blessed with this negativity bias in our brains that has kept us alert enough to negative and fearful cues to survive this long as a species. However, this negativity bias steps too far and infringes on us doing what we know inside is the direct path to happiness and well-being. It
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Altruism

The True Upside of Hard Times

I often say if there's two things in life that we can't evade aside from death and taxes, it's stress and pain. Suffering is a part of life, but the mindset we layer over it makes all the difference. I have so many examples in my life, and you may as well, where a difficult time was upon me and that very time was the seed which brought on the growth of the next moment. The reality is, we never truly know whether an experience in life is good or bad because we don't know what's going to happen next. In Uncovering Happiness I write about how the deepest, darkest moment of my life was exactly what inevitably opened my mind to seeking out support that led me to where I am today. It was this very experience, and many more like it, that led me to seek out mindfulness, which
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Addiction

Difficult People are Messengers for Our Unhealed Parts

We all have difficult people in our lives, it's part of the human experience. Typically, we tend to see them as a nuisance, individuals we have to put up with, or even avoid. This also comes with it's share of suffering. I'm not familiar with the author of the quote above, but the message is worth being curious about. What if we could change our perception to seeing difficult people as messengers or teachers who arouse something inside of us that needs to be cared for or loved? If we do this, might we become less reactive toward ourselves and other people? Inevitably, won't this provide a chance for more relationships to improve? Might it be easier to let go of bitter grudges and move toward strengthening mindfulness, self-compassion, and forgiveness? This isn't Pollyanna, it's a practical approach that can help us focus more on what matters in life. Moreover, consider this: If relationships improve, might that support communities, regions and countries to improve? Is it possible to set off a spark in this way that leads to not only the healing of our individual being, but the healing of humanity? Whoa, that's a bit too large to imagine perhaps, so let's just begin with today and ourselves. Today, try this...
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Altruism

We Can All Do a Little Every Day

Many of us have set New Year's intentions to be more compassionate, but like the mainstream spread of mindfulness, it's often something that's more talked about than practiced. But let this be the moment where we all dig deep from wherever we are to do small things every day to restore a sense of humanity in this world. Really, what would the world be like if we all were more connected with the understanding that we're all in this together. We all want to feel accepted, understood, cared about, that sense of belonging. Allow this video to be a small moment of inspiration: We can all do small things that are focused on daily giving. Here are 10 ideas, or use your own, mix it up it infuses novelty, creativity and fun:
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compassion

9 Calming Tips (with Less Calories) this Holiday with Dr. Susan Albers

The holidays are well under way and what comes with that is the inevitable holiday stress! It can be a not-so-merry time for parents--kids are out of their normal routine, hyped-up on sugar and grumpy after being up too late at holiday parties! Instead of soothing and calming your nerves this year with sugar cookies and candy canes, one of my favorite mindful eating experts and New York Bestselling author, Dr. Susan Albers, recommends these 9 natural techniques from her new book, 50 More Ways to Soothe Yourself Without Food. Treat these following 9 techniques as an experiment and see what you learn along the way: 1) Ho-Ho-Ho Meditation: Holidays are stressful and a recipe for stress eating. Close your eyes and do 3 Santa Clause like belly laughs—this is a simple laughing yoga exercise. Laughing yoga has been shown to reduce your cortisol level, the stress hormone that makes you crave sugary, fatty, salty foods. Creating a moment of laughter can be as simple as googling "funny baby videos" or "viral videos" on youtube. 2) Tea Time. Bye-bye pumpkin lattes! Sip Cinnamon tea. Cinnamon is clinically shown to help regulate your blood sugar which can help to avoid sugary treats. Also, the scent of cinnamon is calming and a sweet, calorie free reminder of the holiday. 3) Munch Well. Does simply chewing on something make you feel better? Try gnawing on leftover pumpkin seeds that you dry and roast. Not only is this chewy and will satisfy your need to munch, it contains L-tryptophan which helps to naturally combat depression and the blues.
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Altruism

It’s Time to Build an Army of Compassion and Here’s How We Do It

After the recent attacks in Paris, the Dalai Lama said: “Unless we make serious attempts to achieve peace, we will continue to see a replay of the mayhem humanity experienced in the 20th century.” It's easy to feel helpless when watching the news or thinking about how deeply rooted the suffering is in this situation and in many other situations of conflict around the world today. When a person watches a relative die in a conflict, their contempt for the other side can last a lifetime. There are so many powerful people and strong forces at play, what can we really do? One answer I came up with is be a force that helps build an army of compassion. The fact is I can do this and you can too. Life is full of actions and reactions. This is what makes up the world around us from the trees we see, to the relationships that are kindled and to the babies that come from them. Every single thing we do matters. When Mahatma Ghandi said, “Be the change you want to see in the world,” underlying that was the simple assumption that everything we do matters. Now we know the science behind the wisdom of his words, and why all the compassionate acts we do can have a significant impact on our mental health and a potential healing in the world. Part of understanding the science isn’t a whole lot different than the understanding of neuroplasticity. How we pay attention and what we pay attention to influences the way our brain grows throughout the lifespan. So if we have a continuous series of moments where we are paying attention to helpless thoughts and worrying, so goes the brain. If we have a continuous series of moments where we are cultivating compassion, joy and curiosity in life, so goes the brain. In the same way, we can have this impact not only on our mental health, but on the relationships that surround us and the world as a whole. You may not be a single force in solving the Middle East conflict or in reversing global warming, but everything you do matters. In order to better understand why everything you do matters, it’s important to understand how emotional contagion works: The social scientists Nicholas Christakis, MD, PhD, and James Fowler, PhD, conducted a study to look at the effect of social networks. To determine if there was a causal relationship for obesity,
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