There is a tradition on the Mindfulness and Psychotherapy Blog. Every Monday, I cite a quote or a poem that is related to mindfulness and psychotherapy in some way and then explore it a bit and how it is relevant to our lives. For me, quotes and poetry can often sink me into a state of greater understanding. So for today, here is a quote by Heraclitus:

Nothing endures but change.

For some this is a comforting quote while for others it reeks of terror.  However, if there is anything we know to be true in this life, it is that change is inevitable. We are born on this planet and we eventually pass, buildings are erected and eventually fall, this earth was created and undoubtedly, at some future date, this earth will also be gone. How might this be helpful in terms of our sanity?

So many of us struggle with difficult feelings of anxiety, depression, craving, grieving, anger, shame, fear, you name it. In these moments, a committee of personalities is gathering in our heads and the ones that represent the intolerable feeling are shouting the loudest. In that moment we identify with that voice, as if we say “yes, yes, I am you, you represent all of me (plug in your difficult feeling here). I am worthless, hopeless and helpless. I am no good, the world is meaningless, and nobody cares about me.”

We become one with these voices and believe these thoughts as facts.

One thing we can be assured of is that as soon as we begin feeling a bit better, these voices are silenced and new voices arise, “what a wonderful day, I can see a future, or that person must really be hurting to treat me that way.”

This isn’t to insinuate that your mind is worthless and don’t believe a word that comes out of it. However, it is meant to insinuate that we have choices. We can become aware when we are in a foul mood and know that the thoughts that are arising are temporary …

In a recent post on the popular blog Beyond Blue, Therese Borchard interviews another fellow blogger, Michelle Russell who writes the blog, Practice Makes Imperfect. In this post Michelle gives us 5 steps to tackle perfectionism.

Perfectionism can be one of the most insidious Mind Traps that exist. It ca be a thief of your time and paralyze you. It can fire up incessant rumination that drives the motor of both anxiety and depression.

In a recent blog post, 3 Steps to Boosting Self Esteem: Mondays Mindful Quote, I brought up a quote by Dogen Zenji:

“To be in harmony with the wholeness of things is not to have anxiety over imperfections.”

Easier said than done.

 In Therese’s interview, Michelle shares a few secrets that I’ll share with you:

1. The 10 Year Question – “Use the 10-year question. Ten years from today, will I even remember this, let alone care about how well it was done or whether it was done at all?” This question is most likely going to shrink your worry as most likely, the answer will be no. To even ask this question, I might argue, takes mindfulness. First, we need to have the awareness that perfectionist thinking is occurring. Labeling it as perfectionism allows us to pop out of the auto-pilot and be present. With this new present moment awareness we now have a choice that we didn’t have before. We can choose to ask ourselves this question or continue with the rumination.
2. Take Time-Out – Michelle also suggests that we “take some time-out” and not to just do more “stuff” but to do things that you would not normally give yourself time to do. Such as take a nap, meditate, do yoga, finger paint, whatever. As many of you know, I conducted a national research study that found that just taking 5 minutes of mindfulness out each day had a significant positive effect with stress reduction and well-being.
3. Label and Redirect the Critical Mind – She reminds us that perfectionism comes from and overly critical mind. Once again, the practice of mindfulness and labeling can really come in handy here with supporting us in dis-identifying from …
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