Following is a 10-point review of Eclipse by a 40-year old Twilight-cult virgin.
First a word or two of context (since any review of anything is only as useful as its phenomenological reference point). I haven’t read any of the books (and was, thus, spared the distraction of comparing the movie to the book). On the rather ardent encouragement of my wife (of nearly 20 years!) I have, not without reluctance, agreed to prime myself with the first two movies on Monday and Tuesday of this week, so that on this Wednesday I could cliff-dive into this odyssey well-primed, even if not “imprinted.”
We watched a noon show in a largely empty Pittsburgh movie-theater, sharing the best seats in the house next to a cluster of aging women that I believe came to see Jake, not Edward. Not that it matters, I had nachos and Goobers. They were, as per usual, good.
On to the review proper: the movie has eclipsed my modest expectations. Here’s my spoiler-proof 10 point analysis of the movie that gives away nothing essential.