Archives for Medications

Bipolar I

Preparing for Seasonal Depression

I suffer from seasonal depression, and every Holiday season I start to worry that a depression will take hold, and I won't be ready for it.

My depression has started to creep up on me and it's not even Thanksgiving yet. Luckily, I went to my psychiatrist to see about increasing the milligrams of my antidepressant, which is very alarming to me cause I have never wanted to increase my medication.  If anything, I'm always trying to lower...
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Bipolar II

Med Compliance: Mother VS Daughter

I’ve always been super med compliant. For over decade every day, twice a day, I have taken my pills. Often times I would get a call from my mother and somewhere in the middle of the conversation I’d hear, “You’re taking your medication right? You have to stay on your meds.” “Yes Mom. I am taking my pills.”

She was always serious when she brought up my mental health, and her tone would change when she discussed my...
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Bipolar II

When Medication Makes You Fat

Sometimes you just wake up fat one day. You don’t know how it happened. You don’t know where it came from. You’re just fat. So, I blame it on my medication and quit my anti-depressant today. My diet and work out regime is pretty steady so all I can really truly blame is my meds. And it makes me mad, sad and confused. The worst part is I really liked the medication. It makes me...
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Bipolar II

When Side Effects Implode

I realize that I am at a crossroad in life and it kept me up the other night. I realized that I have no sex drive and am sauntering through life like a normal person. Welcome to planet earth!! I have always been an alien and liked it with a crude hatred at the end of the day. But, without a sex drive, and feeling normal, makes me wonder: Do I want to be regular?...
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Coping Skills

Fat Check: Med Control Part I

I started an antidepressant several weeks ago, which happened to be around the same time Lent started and all those chocolate Easter eggs hit the shelves everywhere. So, I ate chocolate, which is usually the devils sin so have always stayed far away but, I indulged more or less.  Not a crazy amount, but Easter hit my ass, legs, thighs, and stomach. Or so I think. Or so maybe the new med added to my list of medications packed on a few pounds everywhere.
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Bipolar I

It’s Hard to Go to Your Psychiatrist

It’s a hard thing, for me, to go to my psychiatrist. I know it’s coming on the calendar, and I dread it. I actually forget the date and have to call my psychiatrist and leave a message:

“Hey Dr. I think my appointment is on Thursday the 15th….at 2:30? If i'm wrong call me back, otherwise I’ll be there at that date and time.”

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve left that message. I have...
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Bipolar II

Depression Part VI: It Was My Period

It was my period. That was the reason I lost it last weekend and plummeted into a terrible bed glued depression. I didn’t understand most of the technical psych terms my psychiatrist used when he tried to explain it to me but thankfully, now I know, I am not crazy, I just need to watch out when the next menstrual cycle comes around. I don’t recall ever having this problem in the past when I was on the same antidepressant so this is all new to me. I went into my session knowing that he wasn’t going to change my meds cause I guess I am doing better then our last session. It’s hard to know what to say when you see your doctor. You want to squeeze as much information in the expensive time you have to get answers and positive results and that alone is a stress. But all you can do is do your best to retell the stories you lived through since you started taking a medication and hope it’s enough to help your shrink monitor your behavior.
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Bipolar I

The Beast Is Back: Depression Part II

It has almost been over a week on my new antidepressant and it’s getting easier to open the pill box and take it. Not perfect, but I’m trying. I skipped a couple days which I know is bad but I waffled on taking the whole thing to begin with so I needed to take baby steps. However, this week I was more diligent about keeping a daily routine of taking them and did my best to fight the feel I get when I have to open the box. The stupidest thing I did was look up all the side effects. I prefer not to know.
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