Bipolar II Articles

The Beast Is Back: Depression Part III

Monday, October 27th, 2014

shutterstock_220397773Well, I guess the antidepressant is starting to work cause I made it out for the first time in a long time. Manic, no, but I ended up at a club by myself at a hip hop party. Awesome. I sat at the bar and took in the scene and the next thing I know I was dancing. Was anyone else dancing? No. But I got the party started. I didn’t even change from my work clothes before I decided to go out. I had on an orange top, black pants, and Michael Jackson shiny moonwalk shoes with white socks. I closed down the club. I went home and saw the clock and it was 2:30 in the morning. I don’t recall the last time A: I went out dancing and B: Went to bed past midnight. So I woke up at a reasonable hour and went to take my meds and the antidepressant stared me down.


The Beast Is Back: Depression Part II

Friday, October 24th, 2014

shutterstock_200321435It has almost been over a week on my new antidepressant and it’s getting easier to open the pill box and take it. Not perfect, but I’m trying. I skipped a couple days which I know is bad but I waffled on taking the whole thing to begin with so I needed to take baby steps. However, this week I was more diligent about keeping a daily routine of taking them and did my best to fight the feel I get when I have to open the box. The stupidest thing I did was look up all the side effects. I prefer not to know.


Lunch With No Hot Sauce

Tuesday, October 21st, 2014

shutterstock_78443332Well, I started taking a new medication for depression. So far, so good, until bam, lunch with no hot sauce. I was at lunch with a new coworker and was trying to put hot sauce on my sandwich and my hands started shaking. Everyone at work knows I’m bipolar which causes me to be paranoid to begin with. Now I have new medication with new side effects. I quickly put my sandwich down and hoped that my coworker hadn’t noticed but, quite frankly, what would anyone say to me in that situation. I stared at the hot sauce and frowned.


The Beast Is Back: Depression

Monday, October 13th, 2014

shutterstock_159385295The beast is back. I had a good run though, and I’m not sure how it happened. Well, that’s a lie. My environment hasn’t been the healthiest one. I keep running into my ex, which is terrible cause things did not end on the most amicable terms. I am really burned out at my job and have had other external factors to play into the beast. The beast: Depression.

I’ve spent the last couple weekends finding it hard to leave my bed. Not my place, my bed, which is way worse. I finally broke down and made the call to see my psychiatrist before our scheduled appointment.


12 Signs of Sexual Depression

Thursday, October 2nd, 2014

signs-sexual-depressionDepression manifests itself in a variety of ways. Recently I have found myself sexually depressed and, although it has been a challenge for me, it has taught me that sexual depression is a real thing. 

Here are 12 signs that you might be suffering from sexual depression:

  1. You don’t feel like masturbating
  2. The thought of foreplay with your mate sounds laborious to you
  3. You choose to wear worn out underwear when you have a drawer of fresh ones that are fun and sexy
  4. You think drinking red wine and smoking a joint is gonna fix things
  5. You wear the same bras on a regular basis; no variety whatsoever
  6. You don’t enjoy a nice bath and relax with your sexy body, you just take a quick shower and get it over with
  7. You don’t fully dry your sheets or make your bed on a regular basis cause who cares? You’re sleeping alone anyway so
  8. You buy new high heels and leave them in a box and shove them in the corner of your closet
  9. You think nostalgically reading your first erotic book (for me “Forever” by Judy Bloom) is going to help return your sex drive
  10. Walking by or seeing a hot guy or girl bores you
  11. You wonder if you forgot how to kiss
  12. You consider watching porn for the first time in your life in a desperate attempt to try something new, foreign, and different.

“An App To Diagnose Bipolar Mood Swings By How People Talk On The Phone”

Tuesday, September 30th, 2014

shutterstock_194353091Recently an article published at Co.Exist.com, a site that focuses on groundbreaking innovation, published an article entitled “An App To Diagnose Bipolar Mood Swings By How People Talk On The Phone.” It discusses a system that detects early signs of a bipolar patient slipping into a manic episode. After reading the article, I thought about how my voice on the phone during a manic episode, or during a depressive episode, would decipher whether or not I would reach out to my loved ones, or not. For me, when I was in a manic state I was more inclined to pick up the phone and ramble on and on about the on goings of my life.


15 Reasons Why Women Have Sex With Their Ex

Thursday, September 18th, 2014

shutterstock_188213378A lot of us have been there. Breaking up is hard, and sometimes we lose sight of the reasons why we broke up to begin with.  Here is a list of 15 reasons women have sex with their Ex:

  1. Loneliness: You find it hard to be alone
  2. Nostalgia: You miss the good old days
  3. Arrogance: You look good, you’ve lost weight, look at me now!
  4. Revenge: Having sex to take revenge over a bad breakup makes you feel powerful
  5. Impulsivity: You don’t think through the ramifications of engaging in sex so act impulsive
  6. Closure: Your relationship didn’t end right and somehow you think one more roll in the sack will make things finalized
  7. Fear: You’ll never get a chance to have sex with him again
  8. Insecurity: You lack confidence in yourself so think sex will make you feel better
  9. Heightened sexuality: Your body physically yearns for sex
  10. Convenience: He lives close by which only makes it easy to slip
  11. Regret: You regret breaking up and think somehow sex is going to fix things and make things go back to normal
  12. Jealously: He starts seeing someone else and it makes you jealous enough to make you seek out sex
  13. Stupidity: You forget the reasons why you broke up and act stupid as a result
  14. Desperation: You are desperate for sex so do it without thinking it through
  15. Location: He’s in town from out of state and you’re only going to get a chance to see him once so why not do it one more time

Whatever reason it may be, don’t beat yourself up over it. It happened, you’re human, move on.

Couple in bed image available from Shutterstock.


Bill Maher on Depression Part I

Friday, September 12th, 2014

shutterstock_103803260On a recent episode of the Charlie Rose show, featuring the comedian Bill Maher, Rose starts a conversation about how we’ve had two comedians die this past month (Robin Williams and Joan Rivers) and opens up a dialogue on depression:

Robin certainly I think that was a shock I think to everybody, even his close friends didn’t see that coming, and that’s because he was such a nice guy I think he didn’t want to burden people with it. I mean talk about a functioning depressive. Never late on the set, you know never threw a tantrum, never really let on what he was going through. (Maher)


Back to School, Back to Anxiety

Monday, September 8th, 2014

shutterstock_79409746Going back to school can bring an array of emotions, one of which can be anxiety. When I was a child I had terrible anxiety when it was time to go back to school. Looking back I didn’t realize how many major, and minor instances, fed into my anxiety which I never voiced to my parents. I wish I knew more about my condition to better handle the stressors that accompanied a new year of school. Unfortunately, some children have anxiety about things they won’t voice to their parents. Here are some things to think about that may bring anxiety to your kids:

  • The First Day: The first day of school can carry stress that stem from what can seem like minor occurrences. For example, what seat you get in class, what teacher you’ll get, are your friends are in the same class, are there new people, who are you going to sit with at lunch, are you going to picked last for kickball? All these unknowns result in stress and that’s just on the first day.
  • The Bathroom: Raising your hand to go to the bathroom with the chance of being denied can be very stressful; especially if your child has a teacher with strict rules on bathroom breaks. Not everyone is able to take care of their business at recess so even during your child’s lunch break, they might have stress if they can’t go and know that their teacher is inflexible with bathroom breaks. And forget about what kind of stress or trauma would occur should your child wet their pants. That could result in anxiety for a very long time thereafter.
  • New Bedtime Schedule: Getting enough sleep, especially when insomnia looms, can cause major stress for a child. Summer is over and a firm routine sets in, and even though your child may have had a set bedtime schedule, the stressors of a new schedule will show its ugly face.
  • Grades: Making straight A’s and/or maintaining a GPA in a new grade or in a new school can cause anxiety that can be ongoing on a daily …

That Defining Moment: The Manic Voice

Wednesday, September 3rd, 2014

shutterstock_165489386Growing up my dad had a saying “Don’t be afraid to say no when the others say go.” It stuck with me throughout my life yet sometimes in a manic state there is this tiny voice in my head that tells me to go. Recently I was in Boston for a wedding and was out having a good time. On the last night I found myself at a fork in the road. It was nearing midnight and I was either going to go back to my hotel, go to bed, and get up early to catch my plane or, I was going to continue on my wild journey throughout Boston.


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Recent Comments
  • Erica Loberg: I do work when I am depressed but on the days I’m off I don’t do much. That’s a hard...
  • Becky: How do you work full time hours when you are depressed? Don’t you find the fatigue debilitating?
  • Toxysweden: You should be carefully with mood stablizers and antidressants the combination can make you manic and...
  • Erica Loberg: Thanks Eric. Obvious side effects are hard to overcome but, you gotta do it right!
  • Eric Bosler: In my book, you over coming that highly stressful situation like that is something to be proud of!...
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