jealouscrpdWe all know one of those girls: Those girls that drop out of your life when they get a new boyfriend, that wait for his call, that drops everything at a moments notice for their mate, and that constantly talk about their relationship. Those girls aren’t necessarily dependent on a man.  They can be alpha females, strong, intelligent women that somehow manage to lose sight of their independence, and, as a result their personal relationships begin to suffer.

It can be annoying, and you might swear to yourself that you will never be like them, but, you never know until you get into a relationship then one day, you wake up, and nobody is around.  It’s just you and your mate, and now you have some work to do.

Here are 3 simple signs to remind yourself to maintain your autonomy when you find yourself in a new relationship:

  1. Balance – The most important characteristic of maintaining a healthy relationship with your mate, your friends and family, and yourself, is balance.  If you find yourself spending all your time with your mate you need to take small breaks for yourself, and fill that time with relationships that you have cultivated in your life.  Make it a point to see your friends and initiate making plans.  They will appreciate your efforts.
  2. Work – When your work suffers cause you are so engrossed with your relationship, it is time to take a step back and make more of an effort to put back time and energy into your work.  You worked hard to get where you are in your career, and slacking off because you spend so much time with your lover can tarnish your reputation, and your productivity suffers as a result.
  3. Health – When your workout routine starts to change, that is a sign it’s time to get back into it. Sometimes we alter our workout routine to spend more time with our new relationship.  When you find yourself missing your spin class, or skipping gym days, this is not good.  Be conscious of your time spent at the gym, and when you fall off the track, get back on board.

New relationships are fun, however, when you start to see signs like the ones listed above, take a breath.  You don’t want to lose yourself, and the people you love and care about in your life over a boy. He’s not going anywhere.

Jealous friend photo available from Shutterstock



View Comments / Leave a Comment

This post currently has 0 comments.
You can read the comments or leave your own thoughts.


    Last reviewed: 29 Apr 2013

APA Reference
Loberg, E. (2013). “Those Girls” – What you do when you become one of them.. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 27, 2015, from


Inside the Insane
Check out Erica's book,
Inside the Insane

Subscribe to this Blog: Feed

Recent Comments
  • Countrywriter7: Steve Wyttree has a fantastic program on understanding the roots of violence and how to end it. He...
  • I Be Here For You: Let’s talk about it!
  • Erica Loberg: Thanks Kay. You might be the only one out of a very few that actually understood points of my article. e
  • Kay: I forgot to mention how obviously controversial taking a bible away would be due to “freedom of...
  • Kay: I would like to start off with the fact that I am atheist, so my view on this may be different than a religious...
Find a Therapist
Enter ZIP or postal code

Users Online: 12240
Join Us Now!