Archives for July, 2012
...but you can't take the suburbs out of the girl. Or can you? In a million years I never thought I'd live in a city, much less like it. Don't get me wrong, I've lived in some of the biggest around; Los Angeles, Houston, Orlando, Philly but I use the word "in" loosely because, at the end of the day, I always drove home...30 minutes out Katy Freeway from downtown Houston... an hour out the Santa Monica Freeway from downtown Los Angeles (which, by the way, equated to about 6 miles). At 5:01, these cities became ghost towns, the only visitors for the theater or ballet. I never gave a lot of thought to Urbanites; those exotic and mysterious inhabitants oblivious to sirens blaring and horns blowing, until I found myself in Boston after some sudden and quite unexpected shifts within my company (nice way of saying, I'm pretty sure I was fired ).
I want to inspire you. I want to be funny for you. When I needed ideas, my editor said maybe I should just be real. That that's an important part for the reader to see. Seeing as she has so much experience and all... I feel sad. For the past several days, I have had a little grey cloud on a string attached to my belt loop. It has been my experience that sadness "for no reason" usually indeed, does have a reason. I'm giving up figuring out why some push back. Yeah, just not in the mood. I vacillate a lot. I've felt huge anger with sharp little edges of grief, toss in a little hopeless and that is a fairly good description of how it's going for me right now. And I sloth at the tiniest thing (sloth is my word for cry). I cannot tell you how many times I've been moved to tears this past couple of weeks. I am not a hateful person. I hate a holiday alone.