Psych Central


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Guess where I landed ?  ….at the online dating crossroads again.

There I was, minding my own business, when I received an e-mail offering me joy and forever happiness for just $29.95!  Seizing the moment (clearly a not well thought out moment), I logged on and whipped out my credit card as visions of princes danced in my head.

In the one month that I have been “doing” this, I’ve gone out with 3 men, one who I was particularly drawn to.

Two of these men chose not to move on to a second date.  Apparently, they decided this before I even got the chance to stop swooning from the first date.

I was too busy looking at all of their charming, appealing and positive attributes and ignoring any possible red flags being strung up right in front of me.

This is NOT the way it’s supposed to work out.

I assumed, based on their behavior, that these men would enjoy a second date.  One guy was already planning it so of course, there was no question there.  The only question was about what I would wear.  I could not have been more wrong and I could not have been more surprised. Truthfully.

My friends have assigned names to these men so let’s just call them:

1)   Referee

2)   Husband

3)   Cow Eyes

While Ref still comes around and I’ve settled comfortably into that friendship, the other two flaked.

Husband (ridiculously handsome and a writer) flaked because he had an aversion to communication and Cow Eyes (highly educated, funny and beautiful eyes) decided he was confused and wanted to figure out what he wanted in a relationship (don’t you pretty much know at least some of that before you sign up ? hmm..Maybe it’s just me.)

Cow eyes was the one I felt particularly hopeful about but alas, he wanted to take a break from dating and sure enough, he disappeared off Match.com …..for three days.

That is some seriously fast soul searching.

I had spent the last 3 days consoling myself that his swift change of heart had absolutely nothing to do with me. He announced his position before the tulips he gave me even opened. Ultimately, this one felt like a kick in the stomach and I am still smarting.

It’s not like I have a complete inability to wrap my brain around the concept that there are people out there who won’t be attracted to me. I intellectually get this but let’s combine ultra sensitivity with over the top fear of rejection and it’ll have my name all over it.

My Match.com subscription expired today and I had absolutely no intention of renewing it – this so far, is not my idea of big fun and I need to lick my wounds for awhile.

I have, however, decided that I’m  not going to let two guy’s kicks to the curb keep me from moving on.

2 Guys, 2 Strikes, They’re Out.

Say it with me, “Next!”

Creative Commons License photo credit: foot fingers

 


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    Last reviewed: 28 Feb 2011

APA Reference
Hull, L. (2011). Advetures In Online Dating: Part 2…. Psych Central. Retrieved on April 23, 2014, from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/laughter/2011/02/advetures-in-on-line-dating-part-2/

 

 

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