“Shangri-La” is a mystical utopia paradise that does not exist…Well, unless you’re Bipolar and have a lot of manic episodes.  This utopia can quickly turn into mania and you may feel the endless energy; filled with what the French call “Joie de vivre“ or Joy of Life, we may be in a constant elation.  While this is not true of all mania, it sure does sum up a lot my manic episodes.  Although, that was when I was in my teens and early twenties.

Then my time in Shangri-La La land turned more into Hypomania. It was still characterized by persistent and pervasive elevated euphoric times but the irritable mood, rapid thoughts and “eccentric” behavior took the forefront.  My moods became more and more of a mixed state. That is when the Depression like being in Davy Jones’s Locker took hold.  I would be able to deal with it for some time without being medicated.  Mostly because I did not know what I was dealing with so I just self- medicated the blues away with Canadian Mist (whiskey).  That lead to other problems which is very often the case when you self-medicate.  My behavior was getting more and more violent and I walked around like a ticking time bomb.

Pill Bottle: [Pooping Pills]

Title: The Embarrassment of Popping Pills

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Chato: You Okay Doc???

Title: How dare you tell me how you feel! That’s MY job!

The Curse of Mental Health Self-Advocacy

“Who do you think you are coming in here telling me what your diagnosis is?! Do you see that degree on the wall? That gives me the authority to determine a diagnosis, not you! If you don’t like that then you can leave and see someone else!”

That’s what was YELLED at me (almost verbatim) when I got assigned a new med-manager/psychologist at a well-known mental health provider in Sarasota, Florida.  I was only “officially” diagnosed for two years when I was already running a DBSA support group in the community.  I didn’t quite understand the recovery model back then, but the ignorance of people and stigma just fueled my desire to help others! So, what “grievous” question did I ask that set this glorified med-manager off?

Yellow M&M: Dog-Damn-it Not only am I NUTS… But I’m dyslectic, too!

Title:  M&W’s

Which Came first, Bipolar or Dyslexia?

Is Dyslexia a precursor to Bipolar? I was diagnosed as dyslexic when I was 8 years old at the Boston Children’s Hospital. In short, my father was told I would not be able to read at my expected age group level and my comprehension would be affected.  He also said my hand-eye coordination would be slow and I would not excel at sports. 

Using: { iPod, iPhone, iCrazy }

Title: The age of the ipod has made me finally feel like I fit in.

iPod Generation Making You iCrazy?

The fact is we are moving full-throttle into the computer and super-technology age.  From “smart” phones to bionic body parts.  We are living in a exciting time some refer to as the information age.  Everything is at our finger tips! Heck, my seventy year old Mother even has a cell phone and she hates anything with batteries.  Ever since Bluetooth short range wireless, people don’t look twice if they see you talking out loud or even arguing with yourself…the assumption is you’re on the phone.  (Whether that is the case or not.)  Now that everyone seems to have a camera or video with their phone, you might even become an internet sensation if the video of you during an “episode” goes viral!

I say we should take advantage of this iPod generation and order the iKZ 2000 mock (fake) Blue Tooth headset.  Then, we can walk around and let our inner dialog out.  Not to worry, we will fit in and can start “acting” crazy like all the people do with ipads, iphones and ipods.