Chato’s Wife:When your therapist said you need to make “time for things that are more important,” I’m sure he didn’t mean your computer.

Chato: Z Z Z Z Z (Sleeping)

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Make your marriage a priority! If we “Make sure of the more important things,” we will be able to prioritize our lives.  If you’re married and living with mental disorders, no doubt,  you know the added burden it places on the marriage bond.

I will be married 20 years this October! I can guarantee you, it hasn’t been a cakewalk for either of us! I was asked the other day how have you been able to stay together so long? It’s not a simple answer, especially these last 5 years.

If I had to sum it up in one word, I would say a marriage will live or die on communication. If you can’t communicate, then how can you solve any problems? Without communication, small problems become compounded and before you know it, they are the building blocks of Alienation of Affection…heading for a divorce.

I’m not a marriage counselor.  But, I can tell you this… to maintain our recovery, we need the support of people that we love and who love us.  If you can salvage your marriage, you just may be able to salvage your recovery!  Here is one simple step, I was reading the other day, that could help strengthen our commitment: making a good, safe, loving marriage our priority:

TRY THIS: Write on a piece of paper the following five categories: money, work, marriage, entertainment, and friends. Now number the list according to what you believe to be your spouse’s priorities. Ask your mate to do the same about you. When completed, exchange lists with your mate. If your mate feels that you are not investing enough time and energy in the marriage, discuss what changes you may need to make to strengthen your commitment to each other. Also, ask yourself, ‘What can I do to take more of an interest in the things that are important to my mate?’

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    Last reviewed: 2 Mar 2011