General

The Meaning of Forgiveness in a Relationship

With couples, forgiveness implies the recognition that one has been hurt by the other and the willingness to release the negative thoughts and feelings toward that partner. Forgiveness is not about denial, condoning abusive behavior, or remaining in a dangerous situation – it is about finding a way to go on. It is about dealing authentically and constructively with anger in a way that leaves room for a couple to keep on trusting, moving and hoping.
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General

Psychological Preparation in the Face of Storm Warnings

Few of us are immune to some anxiety on hearing that a hurricane, blizzard, flood or fire may be making a path toward us. Important to our physical and emotional safety is the place we call home. A threat to the homestead has figured throughout time and even literature as something of considerable concern.

How Do We Cope?

When faced with warnings of storms or natural disasters it is to our advantage to prepare physically and psychologically...
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Anger

Mindfulness: An Unexpected Antidote to Workplace Stress

Across settings and disciplines, there is increasing evidence of workplace stress. In her New York Times article reporting on the lack of civility in the workplace, Christine Porath opens with the line,“Mean bosses at work could have killed my father.”

According to her research, intermittent stressors like experiencing or witnessing uncivil incidents or even replaying one in your head elevate stress hormones and a host of health problems.
Porah reports that bosses often demoralize employees by blaming, rudeness, mocking and discrediting. When questioned more than half report being overloaded themselves-having no time to be nice. Some openly disclose fear they will be less leader-like or taken advantage if they are nice.
In her research on workplace bullying, Dr. Stacey Tye- Williams reports the upset underscoring the chaos stories she heard. Her impressions are consistent with the reality that 35% of employees in the U.S. report experiencing bullying in their careers. Bullying is actually more prevalent than harassment, which involves discrimination of a person for age, sex, race, religion or disability and is prohibited by law. Stacey Tye-Williams reports that there is bullying by men and women, bosses and employees.
Underscoring the toxic impact of such workplace behavior is a recent study that found that there is a contagion to the low-intensity negative behavior in a workplace. Experiencing rudeness increases rude behavior.

Of greatest concern is the reality that despite incivility, rudeness or bullying, most employees endure it and pay the emotional and physical toll. As Stacey Tye-Williams reports– People stay in the job because they have bills to pay.

How can Mindfulness Help?
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General

The Cost of Secrets: Understanding the Impact on Self and Others

Secrets are costly. Often motivated by fear, an illusion of protecting self or other or a blatant attempt to hurt or manipulate another, they have been demonstrated to burden us and take their toll cognitively, physically, and emotionally. Essentially they preoccupy us, compromise our health and jeopardize our relationships. Whereas we often keep secrets to prevent the loss of love, respect and connection, too often that is just what they cost.
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