Archives for Authentic happiness

Authentic happiness

Increase Your Happiness: Upregulate Positive Feelings

There has been considerable focus on the attempt to down-regulate (reduce) negative emotions as a way to relieve stress, depression, and the intrusive thinking that follows traumatic events. As such, the focus on positive emotions has largely been used to offset and reduce negative feelings and thoughts.
A Reason to Upregulate Positive Feelings

Recent evidence directs us to consider that the upregulation of positive feelings may serve as a uniquely important factor in expanding our happiness on a daily basis. Researchers have found that upregulation strategies can enhance the impact of positive events on our momentary happy mood and have been associated with higher levels of happiness, life satisfaction and positive emotions.

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Authentic happiness

Change Perspective To Change Your Fear of Failure

There are lots of things that we cannot control in life. One thing that we can change is our perspective. Like the lens on a camera, how we see things belongs to us and can be adjusted to see things differently, more clearly, and from a different angle. Given that our perspective bears on our feelings, our thoughts and our behavior—the ability to change perspective can be a resource for changing aspects of our life.

In their book
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Authentic happiness

Four Essential Ingredients in Loving and Sustaining Marriages

In his latest book, Love Illuminated, Daniel Jones concludes, after culling over thousands of essays written to his Modern Love Column in the New York Times, that what most people really want is a loving and permanent relationship.

Evidence for this is the over 13.5 million self-help books addressing relationships and the interest by so many couples in improving and sustaining their love.

Given the deluge of information offered, I have siphoned out four essential ingredients that can be found in satisfied, long-lasting marriages.
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affair

Is Jealousy Threatening Your Relationship? Five Checkpoints

While most partners want someone to care if they run away with the neighbor, using jealousy to evoke a sign of love from a partner, or feeling jealous of your partner’s interest in something or someone other than you—takes its toll.

Often confused with envy which is the emotion you feel when you want something someone else has (car, wife, job) jealousy is the apprehension or fear of someone or something being taken away from you.

She...
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Authentic happiness

Positive Support in a Successful Marriage:New Findings

Recently the American Psychological Association reported the latest findings on what makes love last in a marriage. The results of one series of studies by Shelley Gable and colleagues were particularly interesting because they were unexpected. They invite speculation and application.

Responding for Better and For Worse

These studies revealed that although we need our partners to be there for us during the “worst” of times, it is our partner’s positive responses to the “best”...
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affair

An Asset to Couple Intimacy: The Capacity “To Be Alone”

While the definition of intimacy may vary depending on the relationship, it is generally felt to be the “ authentic” connection between two people. As such, the connection reflects a mutuality of loving feelings shared and expressed in thought, affect and behavior.

A host of factors including safety, trust, effective communication and sexual exclusivity have been identified as important for intimacy between partners.

Less discussed and perhaps surprising, is the importance of the...
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Authentic happiness

Coping with the Holidays: Family Bonds and Family Binds

While many may aspire to a Hallmark Holiday Season, the reality is that the holiday season involves real people in real families doing the best that they can do.

Most families are a group of related people of different ages with a mix of personalities, needs, feelings and expectations. They may be a nuclear family, an extended family, a reconstituted family or a blended family. In any case, they share an identity as family and, as such, consciously and unconsciously have an impact upon each other.

Their lives can be touched by the joy shared by one family member, the excitement of another and the heartache and loss of still another –sometimes all on the same day.

Most would agree that at times of pain and joy, families are the greatest source of support and the greatest source of applause. They can also be the greatest source of stress.

Holidays seem to turn the volume up on all possibilities.

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Authentic happiness

Forget About Time – Manage Your Energy!

No matter how hard we try, we really don’t manage time. We manage to live within its’ parameters. We can’t make the months of our spouse’s deployment less than they are. We can’t change the fact that we will be 50 years old on our next birthday or that we face an 8-hour workday, an hour commute, and two children who need to be at practice at a certain time.

We can’t manage...
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