Most people who seek psychotherapy believe that they are weak, that their …
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There is a HUGE assumption here about vulnerability. I have experienced that vulnerability and admitting weakness have invited people with pent up anger and resentment to let loose–especially if they are not taking responsibility for their own issues. It’s a time when I don’t have the resources to protect my boundaries. I have had some of the most painful attacks coming from an emotionally immature “loved one” when I have said I am feeling emotionally raw and vulnerable (or hurt or frightened).
Yes. This is where you have to draw the line. When your vulnerability is met with ongoing abusive aggression. No need to present the other cheek in these cases. You have to protect yourself
I am in therapy and the hardest thing to do is to change … how come it is so easy to say you want to change but when you put your change into practice its the hardest thing for me to do.. and feeling vulnerable when you share some of your deep secrets and admitting you have them.. is hard too.. I thought therapy was going to be easy but what I have found out for me is that.. their is no time limit on change and working out life long behaviors..
Very true. The work is never finished. Just like our bodies, our minds need attention too
you know one thing you are not the only one I do not have your diagnosis. remember you are not you diagnosis you have a diagnosis but you are not your diagnosis..i can go one and say I have bipolar and borderline personality disorder and anxiety and post traumatic stress disorder, and major redcurrant depression.. I have these diagnosis but they are not who I am.. I am a 43 year old female and I am a virgin.. I sympathize whit your feelings. I am by no means rich, and so on.. I get ssdi and I work very hard every day to live on my own and do things that I enjoy.. you are maybe feeling lonely and frustrated.. you are not the only one.. you now what I haven’t even been on a date.. I focus on my good things.. I help others, by helping others gets your mind off of yourself.. you are focusing on the things that frustrate you and that is finding someone to love you.. first you have to love yourself.. by loving yourself you love others.. finding someone to love may take a long time.. its not about how you look. or how rich you are or anything like that, you are just focusing on what you don’t have instead of focusing on what you don’t have focus on what you do have.. it sounds like your not happy.. no one can make you happy because you can not change anyone but yourself.. I used to think if my mom died I would kill myself.. but now with therapy with one who really believes in me I can tell all my secrets to. its not people giving up on you is seems as if you are stuck, you have to take care of you physically-mentally-spiritual before you can take care of others.. believe in yourself and start from their.. I am talking to you as one who has tasted loneliness, heartache, frustration, and I have felt rejection and I have felt abandoned. but those are all feelings and you know what feelings change all the time.. I have been in therapy for a very very long time and I have just found a therapist who clicks with me and I have been seeing him for a year and nine months.. I have learned many things.. my therapist says Expect nothing and then nothing will ever hurt you.. stop focusing on other people and focus on yourself… like what do you like and what are your best qualities and take up a craft and focus on other things.. I am not going to say its going to be easy but I am going to say its going to be worth it.. their is a time for everything under the sun.. and when your time comes embrace it..
I have been living on my own for a year now. and I have lived in adult foster homes and I have liven in hospitals.. I just started focusing on where I am and not where I think I should be. its a one day kinda thing.. we already lived in the past and the future is not here yet … the only thing we have is a moment in time.. their Is 864,000 seconds in a day.. you them wisely.. I have lived through hell a few times.. and yet I go on… I encourage you to go on.. look toward today and plan for tomorrow… enough are the troubles of this day.. shoot for the moon and if you don’t make it at least you will fall amongst the stars.. one thing is I am obese and I have lost over 100+ pounds but I have some more to loose.. and the saddest thing is, is not to love yourself..
Good for you May