Archives for Shyness

Anxiety and Worry

Five Dating Tips for Introverts


1. Fess up. Don't pretend to be a social butterfly. There is nothing wrong with being introverted. Tell your date if you are someone who seeks friendship first or needs time to fall in love. You may scare away a few flakes, and instead attract people who will really appreciate you.

2. Meet at places where you feel confortable. If you don't like loud bars, don't go there. Often introverts are also pleasers, and they will do what...
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Anxiety and Worry

The Power Of Being An Introvert



Introverts and shy people all over rejoice: there is nothing wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with needing space and quiet, and preferring a low key dinner with a good friend to a loud and extravagant party.

There is nothing wrong with needing time to retreat from the world and recharge your internal batteries, or to feel overwhelmed by too much...
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Anxiety and Worry

Therapy Is Not For Wimps

Most people who seek psychotherapy believe that they are weak, that their life force has been shaken to the core, that they can't face the world and its challenges. But it's quite the opposite. Daring to look at oneself and one's imperfections really is an act of heroism.

Most of us don't like to admit that we often are in need: we crave to be in a loving relationship, grow roots and...
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Anxiety and Worry

Colored Lights Will Lift Your Mood


We've long known that soft candle light generally triggers a gentler mood, and grey skies can make us more gloomy. Some people tend to be depressed in the winter, when the sun sets early.

The same dynamic takes place inside our homes and offices. The artificial light that comes from the ceiling or floor lamp will have an impact on us. Especially the harsh light of fluorescent bulbs creates a cold, stark atmosphere.

Researchers at the German Fraunhofer...
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Anxiety and Worry

The Lies We Tell Ourselves To Avoid Pain

“Why Do I Do That?” is the title of a new book by fellow blogger Joseph Burgo which deals exclusively with the ways we try to deal with difficult feelings and situations in life: It’s our defense mechanisms that make us look away when things get dicey or hard to deal with. The book is released on October 29th and will be available on Amazon in print-on-demand and eBook versions. In...
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Anxiety and Worry

Exercise Instead of Medication



Exercise can be just as effective against depression as medication, especially in mild to moderate cases. Study after study has come to this conclusion, and it can even help with major depression and to prevent reoccurring episodes of it.

Many alternative health professionals talk about how "food is medicine;" now, the corresponding view is "exercise is medicine." A recent news item claiming that exercise is more crucial in managing diabetes than food, is an example of...
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Anxiety and Worry

How To Lose Your Inner Critic



It's bad enough feeling anxious or depressed. But what makes the emotional pain so much worse, is that we can't just accept what it going on inside our minds. We have to criticize ourselves for being afraid, angry, jealous and so on. That's what really brings us down: the inner critic.

Let's say something went wrong at work. One of your clients decided to go with another firm and you feel directly...
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Anxiety and Worry

How To Deal With Shyness And Social Anxiety



Lots of people are shy. I am, kind of. It doesn't come out as much, now that I don't go to loud parties and crowded bars anymore. I prefer lunch dates and small dinner parties, and my social needs are fully met by being in quieter and smaller settings.

A big part of why people suffer so much around others is because they feel they should abide by certain social standards. Sometimes they're not even aware that they...
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Anxiety and Worry

Taking On Other People’s Opinions



One of my clients came in the other day and was quite upset. About herself.

"Why can't I just stick to my guns?" she asked aghast.

It's something that happens to her quite frequently. She thinks she has an opinion about something, but as soon as someone else explains why they think differently, she sways over to the other side.

"It bothers me that I am so understanding" she concluded.

Indeed,...
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Anxiety and Worry

Letting Go

Letting go isn't easy. Our tendency is to hold on to our hurt, our convictions, our attachments, and our belief that we are right.
Recently, one of my patients insisted that her boyfriend be able to read her every desire from her eyes. As she contemplated what it would be like to let go of this habit, she asked a question that gets to the heart of letting go: "Do you want to...
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