Archives for October, 2010
As smart as you or I may be, we just can't fix everything. Broken trust, broken hearts, broken family ties, life-altering decisions, split-second tragedies. These are some of the unfortunate things that develop in people's lives every day. Some of these can happen in the snap of a finger, and others build slowly over years of time. But one thing is for sure - sometimes we just have to do the best we can.
If you feel like you're having more than your share of ups and downs, you may be on to something. A person's mood can change many times during the course of a day. Your kids may see you mad and frustrated when you dropped them off late for school, but see you smiling a few hours later when you join them for lunch in the cafeteria. What happens in between your mood changes? Why not take a closer look today?
I found an article with an interesting twist on the warning of kids having too much TV and computer time. By now, it's pretty well known that this excess can have various harmful effects on kids' lives. And it's interesting that most of the counteraction has been to promote physical activity. Even more interesting is to note that according to this article, just adding physical activity to excessive TV and computer time doesn't make up for the negative effects. Also, just having more physical activity didn't necessarily result in overall higher psychological scores. In fact, the best overall psychological scores came from kids who were more sedentary. The article points to hyperactivity as one reason for lower psychological scores despite more physical activity.
As a parent, we want our kids to have success. But as we are humble human beings - we just have our own perspective to view the world with. We take ourselves with us all the time, no matter how objective we might try to be. Our kids' success may or may not come in the same manner that it did in your own childhood. Sometimes, that is the best possible thing. Other times, it leaves a longing in our heart. Where do you draw the line between your experience and their experience?
You know what it is when you hear it - whining. It's that high-pitched musical way that your child talks to you about something they don't like. It's also usually accompanied by plenty of slouching, maybe a lowered head, a big frown, or look of serious distress. Plenty o' drama for such a little person. Don't worry - I have an unexpected secret weapon for you. Humor. Of course, for you to use humor when your child whines, you have to be able to turn off your usual reaction (whatever that is). When you hear that lovely tone of voice, your first job is to bite your tongue. Let them state their case for such weeping and gnashing of teeth. In fact, look as sympathetic as you possibly muster. The dramatic effect of the whining actually diminishes when you offer little resistance. And here's where you draw them in to your lair of unexpected humor.
If you have more than one child, you have had more than one type of potty training experience. Some kids like to dawdle along, getting used to the whole idea for a long time before they do something. Others realize what's at stake when they can do it all the time and speed up their time table. And then there are others who seem to have trouble getting past the hurdle altogether. No matter what your child's experience with potty training, it is a definite test of your parental skills and patience.
I firmly believe that one of the best ways to care for your family is to make your marital relationship better. This improves the overall level of stability and satisfaction for the parents and the kids. In that vein, I found a really cool article discussing the way couples speak to each other. Communication isn't just saying words back and forth with each other. There's a whole lot of non-verbal stuff going on to support the words you say. Think back to when you and your spouse were in the earlier days of dating or even marriage. You probably behaved and spoke a little differently when they were around you. Part of what you were doing is called style matching.