If you recall last week, I was in the midst of the Christmas Blizzard of 2009.  Not what I or many people had been planning for.  As it happened, I planned for a post on Christmas Day for what I wished my family and yours in 2010.  Because of all that came with the storm, I wasn’t able to post that on Christmas Day (or visit half of my family).  So instead, I have transformed it into a post about New Year’s Wishes.  As my mom (whom I could not visit) said, “blessed are the flexible for they shall not be bent out of shape.”  Sigh…

I had a few specific Christmas wishes this year, and as usual some were fulfilled and some weren’t.  That made me think a little bit beyond myself, and I created a wish list for families everywhere regarding their mental well being.  These wishes are for both your families and mine.  As you read these, consider what you might add on the end of the list from your perspective.

Peace on earth seems a little large, so I’m going to go with more peace in my home and yours.  Just a little less assuming-the-worst-of-each-other.  Just a little more willingness to talk openly without fear of emotional rejection.  Just a little more patience with each other.

Some people this coming year are going to develop a mental illness.  Many of these people will not expect that they would be the “type” of person to have this happen.  My wish for those people is that their families are sensitive to their needs and help them through the rough spots.

Parenting is a tough job, no question about it.  My wish is for me and all parents to do more teaching as they parent.  Make parenting less about punishing and more about growing up a young person.  Make it less about tolerating the struggle and more about appreciating the opportunity and challenges.

It is so cliche, but kids really do grow up too quickly.  Today, right now, you have a chance to parent the way you really want to, how you know it would be best for everyone.  You don’t have to wait until you learn all the techniques or perfectly understand child psychology.

I wish for myself and for all parents out there the ability to relax and enjoy their children.  School, work, and activity schedules may be part of life, but they shouldn’t shut out good old-fashioned family togetherness and fun.

Maybe you don’t have the most ideal family situation. In that case, I say “so what”?  “So what” to the traditional definition of family and “hello” to a new idea of family that includes friends and other people who love you.  My wish for people who feel unaccepted by their family is that they find a place to belong.  Family doesn’t have to just be blood ties if the blood is bad.  Everyone needs to belong somewhere, and I wish for more people the freedom (and internal “permission”) to define their family in whatever way makes them feel safe and secure.

I know that some (OK, maybe all) of these wishes might be tall orders.  It’s to easy to make change and increase self awareness.  But I think if I honor these wishes out loud, maybe you and I can have a better chance at making them happen.  If each of us, one at a time, can make a few of these efforts this year, consider the potential ripple effect.

More peace, more compassion, more awareness – those are the gifts that stay good all year long.  Happy New Year, dear readers.

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From Psych Central's website:
PsychCentral (December 31, 2009)

    Last reviewed: 31 Dec 2009