Comments on: Helping Kids Who Stand Out From The Crowd http://blogs.psychcentral.com/family/2009/11/helping-kids-who-stand-out-from-the-crowd/ A blog by Erika Krull about family mental health issues, parenting and children. Fri, 10 Feb 2012 03:57:31 +0000 hourly 1 By: Erika Krull, MS, LMHP http://blogs.psychcentral.com/family/2009/11/helping-kids-who-stand-out-from-the-crowd/comment-page-1/#comment-786 Erika Krull, MS, LMHP Wed, 02 Dec 2009 15:30:33 +0000 http://blogs.psychcentral.com/family/?p=886#comment-786 Jayne- Ignoring name calling can be a good tactic. When it moves across to manipulation, threats, using their position of power to hurt him, that's when it's bullying. Bullies target kids who appear weak because they likely won't fight back. If your son appears confident and consistent that he doesn't take the flack and doesn't give a strong reaction, he likely won't be targeted. Just keep in good communication with him to be sure he is still feeling good about how he's handling it. Jayne-

Ignoring name calling can be a good tactic. When it moves across to manipulation, threats, using their position of power to hurt him, that’s when it’s bullying.

Bullies target kids who appear weak because they likely won’t fight back. If your son appears confident and consistent that he doesn’t take the flack and doesn’t give a strong reaction, he likely won’t be targeted.

Just keep in good communication with him to be sure he is still feeling good about how he’s handling it.

]]> By: Jayne Coleman http://blogs.psychcentral.com/family/2009/11/helping-kids-who-stand-out-from-the-crowd/comment-page-1/#comment-785 Jayne Coleman Tue, 01 Dec 2009 07:11:19 +0000 http://blogs.psychcentral.com/family/?p=886#comment-785 I was the tallest child in my primary school and taller than many of my teachers. My son is in the same position now. Being thirteen and standing out so obviously from the crowd makes one a natural target, especially if you are doing well academically. The "Tall Poppy" syndrome is well known and their is a widespread perception that they "need to be cut down to size". One of the ways to do this is through name calling. I was first called Giraffe, then Brixton Tower after the tallest tower in Johannesburg at the time, and finally in high school I became "Freaky Deek" - a play on my surname. As a hyper sensitive, shy, bookworm this was agony. My son has it a little easier because he's a boy but nonetheless he wept on my shoulder last year because the kids at school were calling him so many names. We told him to ignore them when they called him something other than his name. Just recently he told us that this worked for him in that the kids got to know that if they called him Columbus or some other name he would just not respond. It was a kind of Pavlovian training in reverse! I recently read an article, however, that said that, especially in dangerous schools, this need not be the best way to deal with verbal bullying. How did other people deal with verbal bullying - either for themselves, or their kids? I was the tallest child in my primary school and taller than many of my teachers. My son is in the same position now. Being thirteen and standing out so obviously from the crowd makes one a natural target, especially if you are doing well academically. The “Tall Poppy” syndrome is well known and their is a widespread perception that they “need to be cut down to size”. One of the ways to do this is through name calling. I was first called Giraffe, then Brixton Tower after the tallest tower in Johannesburg at the time, and finally in high school I became “Freaky Deek” – a play on my surname. As a hyper sensitive, shy, bookworm this was agony. My son has it a little easier because he’s a boy but nonetheless he wept on my shoulder last year because the kids at school were calling him so many names. We told him to ignore them when they called him something other than his name. Just recently he told us that this worked for him in that the kids got to know that if they called him Columbus or some other name he would just not respond. It was a kind of Pavlovian training in reverse! I recently read an article, however, that said that, especially in dangerous schools, this need not be the best way to deal with verbal bullying. How did other people deal with verbal bullying – either for themselves, or their kids?

]]> By: PsychCentral http://blogs.psychcentral.com/family/2009/11/helping-kids-who-stand-out-from-the-crowd/comment-page-1/#comment-787 PsychCentral Tue, 24 Nov 2009 07:41:08 +0000 http://blogs.psychcentral.com/family/?p=886#comment-787 Family Blog: Helping Kids Who Stand Out From The Crowd http://bit.ly/6h8XaP Family Blog: Helping Kids Who Stand Out From The Crowd http://bit.ly/6h8XaP

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