Making Big Life Changes More Easily
Last month, my husband and I packed up the house we’d lived in for 20+ years in the suburbs of Boston, sold it and bought a new place on Cape Cod. Sounds lovely, doesn’t it? I wish I could say that I stayed calm, cool and collected through it all. I didn’t. While talking with a friend, I described it as a “a roller coaster ride, complete with knuckle whitening moments of terror.”The day after that conversation, I was mulling over this depiction. It occurred to me that a roller coaster was an apt analogy, but for a reason I hadn’t intended. Some people like roller coaster rides! What if I could learn to enjoy the journey and not just grin and bear it? I realized that it all depends on where I put my focus.
Here are some examples:
White knuckle, fearful and unhappy focus:
Fact: Our new condo is under construction.
My fearful thoughts — What if it’s not done in time? We won’t have a place to live! This will be a huge added cost in the middle of tourist season! Plus, what will happen with our two cats?
Go with the flow focus:
Fact: Our new condo is not completed on time.
My go-with-the-flow thoughts — It’s okay. We’ll find a temporary place to live. It could be kind of fun, like being on a mini-vacation. I can enjoy the time and really look forward to settling in to the new place. We can begin to explore the area. I’m sure someone would rent to us even with two cats. It would be fun to be near the beach and have a great place to take walks.
Result — We were introduced to a woman who had a lovely island cottage by the beach about twenty minutes from our new home. She offered to rent it to us at a very reasonable price. She loves cats and was fine with Sophie and Willow joining us. We love taking walks around the island. Our new place is going to be ready at the end of June just in time for another family to move in here.
Using Your Intuition to Make Great Decisions
I realize that I can’t prove it was my more optimistic “go with the flow” thinking that allowed this to have a happy ending. I know that shifting my focus made me feel a lot better and suspect it paved the way for good things to happen synchronistically.
We often have to make many more difficult life decisions than my example above. I believe that intuition can be a huge help during these times. It’s all too common to fear you’ve made the wrong decision and attempt to go back to what you’ve known. Let’s face it. No one likes to get out of their comfort zone without a guarantee of success.
Here are some things to think about when you’re making a big decision:
- Does your decision make you feel interested, curious, happy and/or enthusiastic? If you can answer yes to these, that’s your intuition saying “yes” to your decision.
- Do you have a strategy to deal with the inevitable fear and discouragement that will occasionally come along? Options might be to change your focus, have a supportive friend or online community to talk –with, or perhaps take action on the decision over a longer period of time.
- Have you created time for meditating, dreaming, visualizing and affirming a positive outcome to your decision? Research has shown that when we’re clear about the outcome we want, we’re more likely to get it.
- Have you let go of things that drain you, and made space in your life in order for your goal to expand and grow? Sometimes it’s difficult to make a decision about the future because our current life is so filled up with things that weigh us down.
- Are you continuing to ask your intuition for guidance by asking questions like, “How can I create (this intention?)” or “What are the next steps I need to take in order to create (this intention?)” Listen for the answer. It may come in images, feelings, words, dreams, or you may “just know the answer.
Stay tuned for more on how my intuition is guiding me in my new life. In the meantime, remember that intuition always leads you in the right direction. Pay attention to what brings you joy, peace and happiness. That’s where your true success lies.
Robinson, L. (2013). Making Big Life Changes More Easily. Psych Central. Retrieved on April 22, 2015, from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/divine-intuition/2013/06/making-big-life-changes-more-easily/