Archives for Coping with Depression

Alcoholism

4 reasons why addicts should not trust doctors

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Last month I went to the emergency room with tightness in my chest and shortness of breath. I answered a bunch of questions about my medical history, told them about my depression and bipolar, the meds I am on and made it clear that I am a recovered alcoholic/addict and that I do not want to be given any medications that might cause me to relapse.

The doctor came, looked at my chart, looked at me and asked if I was in pain. I said no, just uncomfortable tightness and shortness of breath. .

"Do you have any pain?" the doctor asked.

"I'm going to give you some Ativan. It will help you relax," the doctor said.

"No you're not," I said. "I'm a recovered alcoholic/addict and I don't take benzos."

"Why?" the doctor asked.

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Coping with Depression

Why are all the great Christmas classics about depression?

Ever notice that the great holiday classic are about depression?

There's George Bailey, the financially strapped father of a posse of rowdy kids in It's a Wonderful Life. Then there's Scrooge and the Grinch. And how about that Santa-denying mother in Miracle on 34th Street? Charlie Brown and his pathetic little tree.

Let's not forget The Littlest Angel, a story about a little boy who dies, goes to heaven, can't keep his halo on straight, can't sing on key with the seraphim and misses his dog? Then there is that country western song little boy who want to buy his dying mama a pair of shoes. We have Elvis' Blue Christmas and Do They Know It's Christmas about people starving in Africa.
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Coping with Depression

What to buy someone with depression for the holidays? Nothing.

I did not want to answer the door during my last major depression and I did not answer the phone.

So, what gift do you give someone who is in this kind of depression?

Consider nothing. There is nothing you can put a bow on that will really mean much to someone in a deep depression. Jewelry, flat-screen televisions, perfume - none of these things will lift us out of our depression. Believe me, if we could buy our way out of depression, we would have done it by now.

Consider, too, that a generous gift is going to make us feel even worse about ourselves because we won't be able to go to the mall and get you something. And, we will feel obligated to send a thank-you not or call to say "thank you."
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Alcoholism

Six rules I follow to avoid depression during the holidays

Yesterday, as I was sitting on the front porch I was smacked upside the head by a Hallmark moment. An SUV with license plates from another state pulled in the driveway of the family across the street. I love having this family and their little ones across the street.

From the SUV spilled little cousins and what looked to be an aunt and grandmother. Their front yard was filled with hugs and babies on hips and...
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Coping with Depression

Death and depression: Two questions you must ask

I am now in the midst of watching a loved one die - slowly. This is the third time I've been down this road. The first two deaths were my parents. Cancer ate them little by little and they died 16 months apart.

Today, it is the man of my dreams, the love of my life. His cancer has metastasized again and I'm afraid it won't be long. He is a wonderful man and I will miss him dearly...forever.

About two years after my mother died I slid into the darkest depression I had ever experienced. Frankly, it scared the heck out of me and when I finally clawed my way out of it I vowed I would do everything and anything to never fall into that black hole again.

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anxiety and dreams

How much sleep is enough/too much when you have depression

The first thing my psych-nurse practitioner said on my first visit during my last major depression was this:

"First, we need to get you some sleep."

What? I expected her to say anti-depressants - at the time a major fear of mine. But sleep? Really?

I immediately decided that I liked this woman because her top priority was something natural - sleep. Although she did prescribe a very low dose of Seroquel to help me sleep soundly, I liked her recognition of the body's own ability to heal itself.

Plus, I hadn't had a really good night's sleep in a long time. And I really, really like to sleep.
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Coping with Depression

Four reasons to exercise when you have depression

Shortly before my depression snapped me in half, I went to a spin class at the gym. Of all the exercise I have done - and I have done a lot - spin is the most intense aerobic workouts.

An hour of riding a stationary bike -mostly at your maximum heart rate - and my body is toast. However, my brain is on a pink cloud - awash in endorphins.

But on that day, the endorphins did not...
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Coping with Depression

Fuel for depression: I get paid when bad stuff happens

It's 6:32 am and I just had an epiphany: I spend too much time thinking about what's wrong.

I'm a journalist so it goes without saying that that's what I get paid to do. We write about what's wrong. Have you seen that commercial where the kid says to his buddy, "My dad's company didn't get hacked today." That's not news.

So, basically I have spent the better part of the last 30 years focusing on what's wrong, why...
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Coping with Depression

Anger management techniques for a middle-aged woman

Last Friday afternoon I found myself standing behind what used to be an auto repair shop with a 16-pound sledgehammer over my head, beating the crap out of a large tire. It's not something you would expect a 56-year-old woman to do on a sweltering summer day in Florida.

But I was angry. I had just spent an hour in what I shall call "intense fellowship" with a handful of my colleagues and a lawyer and I was not at all happy with the outcome of the meeting. I knew if I did not get rid of that anger in an "appropriate" way, it would come out sideways.

Most likely I would verbally eviscerate someone and remain pissed off for days. I would relive that intense hour of fellowship over and over - fuming, stewing and creating scripts of what I would do next.

And then I heard a little voice: Depression is anger turned inward.
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Alcoholism

How my depression nearly killed my sobriety

This month I celebrate 17 years of sobriety. Let me say that again. This month I celebrate 17 years of sobriety.

I can't believe I just said that because it seems so impossible and sounds so weird coming from my mouth.

17 years.

How the heck did that happen?

One day at a time. I also followed suggestions, especially from a doctor friend who told me about 12 years ago that I was in a major depression and needed antidepressants.
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