The health of your romantic relationship can either enhance or diminished the quality of the lives of those who come into contact with it.  Whether your relationship is strong and in good health or floundering and weakened by disease or dysfunction, it is sure to have an impact on others.

For example, your loving care of each other can envelop and soothe your children. Alternatively, your arguing and discord will frighten and generate insecurity and instability for them. Your family member can benefit from your happiness and they can be confused and hurt by the pain they see you endure or inflict on each other.

They may not know it, but the people that are closest to you, like your children or parents, are studying your relationship and at times making a decision about their worth and value based on how they see you and your partner treating each other. This is not only true of your children and close family members however. As a couple in recovery, you are affected by and have an affect on other recovering couples as well.

No man is an island …and neither is a couple in a romantic relationship. People need people. People need people regardless of our belief that we can have a successful life with only each other. When you are in a committed, successful romantic relationship, you affect many others and many others are able to affect you. Allow your romance to enjoy the give and take of support from others. Allow others to assist your coupleship to grow into the supportive unit you know it can be and allow yourselves to give freely of what you find in your loving romance.

When you are in a committed, successful romantic relationship, you affect many others. You will influence others to take risks in their own relationship because you have demonstrated how thankful you are that you were willing to take the same risks. Many couples in recovery will want to emulate your happiness.

So, as a recovering couple who continues to find the joy in sharing our own romantic journey with others, we remind you that we are one with you in the spirit of this journey, together.  Good luck!

This article was written by John & Elaine Leadem, senior supervisors of the Leadem Counseling & Consulting offices in Toms River, NJ and East Brunswick, NJ. The content of this article is based on their book: “One in the Spirit: Meditation Course for Recovering Couples”



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    Last reviewed: 5 Jun 2013

APA Reference
Leadem, J. (2013). No Couple is an Island. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 20, 2014, from


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Elaine Leadem, MSW, LCSW & John Leadem, MSW, LCSW are authors of many books, including One in Spirit & An Ounce of Prevention.
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