The couples who reach a point of dissatisfaction with their romantic relationship that they find themselves considering the need for professional help, or selecting self-help titles such as “Awakening To Your Soul Mate: A decision to be IN Love ©” have probably known for some time that something is wrong.
The couples we have worked with over the years report that they talked themselves out of being concerned for years before the first affair, the first meeting with the divorce attorney, or the present romantic estrangement and alarm that they feel. In Part One of this two-part article we presented to you case snippets of seven such true stories where various couples found themselves wondering what had happened to the magic in their romance or marriage.
These same couples can usually remember what it was like when they first met and how amazing it was that everything that the other person said was fascinating; a warm hug could last all night! The reasons that partners in a romance will tolerate the growing dissolution of their love are too numerous to cover, but suffice it to say that every romance begins and dies with a story that each of the partners bring to the union.
In the beginning of any relationship, each of the partners’ personal stories contributed to the attraction that they felt toward each other. By the time the romance is so dry that it would be considered flammable however, the un-inspected stories and ill-gotten ways in which they cope with life’s emotional challenges that each partner had brought into the relationship are now causing them to feel disconnection and alone – or looking for love in all the wrong places. If you are dissatisfied with your romance or find yourself considering a termination of the relationship — this is a good time to take action. The relationship may be too far gone to save, but most can be rebuilt.
Every relationship has a breaking point at which the alarms of concern stop blaring in the background and the painfully routine verbal battles and emotional conflict all but disappear. Some couples are apt to view the calm as a relief or cease fire. …
The things that partners do not talk about or bring to mutual resolution will eventually undermine the romantic bond in any relationship because of the lack of intimacy. All too often romantic partners fail to bring their concerns or fears to each other.
In the first part of this two-part topic we will briefly highlight some of the issues we have heard about over the years for you to see if they are familiar to you: