“What do you have to be sad about?”
If you’ve ever suffered from depression, you probably know all too well the anger, frustration, guilt, and hopelessness that attacks you both physically and mentally when someone asks that question. And, to add insult to injury, the person who asks the question is usually someone pretty close to you - your mom, your best friend, your significant other - someone who know you best.
Yet, experience has taught me they ask this question because they know you so well - they know about your awesome career, your fabulous wardrobe, your big fat bank account - you know, all the material, tangible, superficial successes on the outside that often have absolutely nothing to do with how happy or sad you feel on the inside.
“What do you have to be sad about?”
It seems former Sopranos actor Joe Pantoliano (he played Ralph Cifaretto, remember?) was asking himself that very question not so long ago.
At a recent Bristol-Myers Squibb Co. press conference, Pantoliano talked candidly about his battle with depression, admitting his own confusion to the audience:
“Here’s someone that has lived his whole life and achieved every dream he has ever had. . . . I couldn’t understand why I felt empty and hollow and sad,” Pantoliano said.
I can understand how easy it would be to look at a successful actor - or any celebrity - and wonder how he could feel anything but sheer elation. Of course, I remind myself that we never truly know what’s going on inside another person’s mind, and depression doesn’t discriminate.
No mental illness does.
What about you? Have you ever been on the receiving end of that question? How did it make you feel? How did you respond?
P.S. If you want to know more about Joe Pantoliano, here are two interesting facts: He not only starred in Canvas, a 2006 movie that looks at one family’s struggle to learn to deal with schizophrenia, but he also founded No Kidding, Me Too!, a “nonprofit organization comprised of entertainment industry members united in an effort to educate Americans about the epidemic related to brain dis-ease in all forms.” Talk about using your celebrity for good!
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From Psych Central's Alicia Sparks:
» Would Celebrity Mental Health Advocacy Make A Difference For Young Adults? - Celebrity Psychings (December 17, 2008)
Yah, I’m psyched to have a celeb come out and break some stigma, but I’m put off by his at least quasi-spokespersonness for BMSquibb. I don’t see any practical or scientific benefit to having what is essentially, at least a form, of celebrity endorsement/sponsorship of certain drugs. I have problems with direct to consumer advertising and drug reps and generally how meds are marketed, when it should really be a relationship between doctors, unbiased scientific researchers/their well documented studies, and patients. Adding a celebrity to the mix, in this context, I feel is inappropriate and counter productive.
So go Joe Pantoliano.. minus his at least quasi celebrity drug rep status (I saw quasi because I don’t know his official affiliation with BMSquibb.)
@ Katharine - Thanks for chiming in! When I read the original article, I raised an eyebrow at the first mention of BMS, too. I don’t know whether or not Pantoliano actually endorses BMS, or whether this press conference was just a platform to speak about mental health and he took the opportunity. Either way, Big Pharma is big business that’s not going away, so it’s our responsibility to separate the core message from the quasi endorsement. Let’s just continue to hope people actually make that separation.
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