Do you know someone who tends to take every little thing you say personally and holds a long-term grudge against you? What do you think the problem is? Is it the offense itself or could it possibly be the personality of the offended? Sometimes it's both. The negative effects of living with a rageful, angry, selfish, and domineering person can be great. The emotional, psychological, and physiological effects can also be great. A raging personality can also turn into a calm and polite personality depending on the situation. This is what keeps everyone confused and unassuming. For many people living with this type of personality, they often wish others could truly see the truth. It is certainly not easy to live with or cope with this type of personality and emotional lability. This article will discuss how to cope with this type of personality and what tools you can use as your best weapon of defense.
For most of us, we've had a few rainy days that felt endless. But for the remainder of society, rainy days happen all the time. A lot of people tend to believe that depression is a fleeting emotion and something that cannot destroy the natural flow of one's life. Sadly, some families tend to make depression taboo and refuse to acknowledge it or discuss it. The use of medication further stigmatizes families and causes barriers for open discussion. For fear of appearing "helpless" or "needy," some people suffer in silence all alone until one day their illness becomes so apparent that it's almost impossible to hide.
Trauma is a complex, but necessary subject. For the month of June and July I spent the majority of time writing articles on childhood trauma. It's a known fact that many people fail to recognize how common and pervasive it is. Our society tends to believe that trauma is only for those individuals who have experienced a terrible life event. But that is not all trauma is. Trauma, as noted in previous articles, can be secondary or vicarious. You only need to listen to a host of detailed stories to feel the effects of trauma. In fact, research suggests that trauma can affect all of us and it doesn't have to be us experiencing the event ourselves. For example, imagine that you are being told about a close friend's sexual and physical abuse as a child. Every detail, every emotion, and every sensory experience (smell, sounds, sights, tactile, etc.) are being described to you at great length. You might find yourself feeling overwhelmed, depressed, or even stressed. Perhaps you went to bed that night and had a dream about it. Or maybe you become hypervigilant in your own relationships to ensure that you avoid being abused. In a sense, you are becoming just as emotionally vulnerable as your friend. This is called secondary trauma, or, as in the previous article, compassion fatigue. Secondary trauma occurs when you have empathy and concern for the person who is sharing their traumatizing story with you. This article will explore a trauma-based model known as the SELF model and provide tips on how you can engage in introspection about the trauma you may have experienced in your life.
Are you the father of a son who struggles with mental and behavioral problems? Do you find yourself overwhelmed by the emotional and mental health needs of your son? Are you are mother or wife in a household almost completely destroyed, on a daily basis, with family conflict and emotional chaos? If so, E Martyn Ramsey has written a book just for you. He the father of a son who, following an intense family conflict, decided to commit suicide by going into their basement and hanging himself. Life for Joe, Ramsey's son, was characterized by internal pain that he could not sooth in this world. No drug, no friend, no occupation, no event, no thought, or success could heal the internalized pain that Joe carried with him until the day of his suicide. Lets welcome E Martyn Ramsey as he shares his story with us today.
Are you a mental health professional or work in the field of mental health? Are you a caregiver? What are some of your most vivid experiences? There is always at least one experience that made some kind of impact on you emotionally, psychologically, or even physically (, injuries during restraints, etc.). The experience could be positive or even negative. Either way, the experience will probably always be apart of your existence. It's difficult to...
How would you describe your parent(s) growing up? Were the parents who used corporal punishment (spanking), "time out," or some other form of punishment? Despite years of controversy surrounding what parenting "techniques" are good and what are bad, the topic of child abuse rarely gets discussed. It's a taboo topic. This week, during Personal Stories Week, we will be discussing a variety of topics relating to attachment, parenting, mental illness, and mental health in general. Today I have Ginger Kadlec, an advocate for children, sharing her knowledge about child abuse with us.
Stories are powerful. It wasn't until I began in the field of clinical psychotherapy that I recognized just how important stories are to the structuring of our lives. We gain meaning and strength from our stories. We also provide others with empowerment and courage through our pain. A story can be so powerful that it changes not only the heart and mind of a person struggling with mental health challenges, but also their life. Personal Stories Week has become a yearly tradition for me on PsychCentral. I have the opportunity to contact various inspirational speakers, social media tigers, parents, families, caregivers, blog talk radio hosts, writers, authors, twitter followers, other professionals, etc. to invite them to write an article and share their experience within the mental health and social welfare system with us. It's such a great time connect with writers and readers. It's an entire week filled with personal stories of triumph, motivation, courage, and knowledge. I invite you to check in everyday and to share the many stories you will see this week.
What kind of a parent would you consider yourself to be? Are you a good parent, firm parent, or somewhere in the middle? For many parents they would quickly identify themselves as a parent somewhere in the middle. But in some cases the reality that parents lack appropriate skills to cope with their child’s behavioral and mental health problems is real. This article will discuss the challenges often faced by parents raising children with mental and behavioral problems and why many of them often fall into the trap of perpetrating physical, emotional, and psychological abuse.
How would you feel if a therapist, who claimed to be trained in working with adopted or foster children with mental and behavioral health problems (a topic discussed last week) came into your home and encouraged you to engage your 10-year old child in a "therapeutic session" that would include you holding your child down to re-create the "childbirth experience?" How would you feel if a trauma therapist forced you to discuss a very bad experience that was traumatizing to you? Would you go along, even though it might sound ridiculous or cause you distress? Would you be afraid and totally shut down? Most parents would be enraged and most of you reading this are probably shaking your head and questioning where I am going with this. Therapy can be one of the most rewarding experiences for individuals who have struggled with trauma and attachment. But there are many types of therapies that can also be detrimental to a child, primarily an adopted or foster child. In fact, a "therapy" known as Attachment therapy (also known as holding therapy or rage reduction therapy) has always been a controversial "alternative therapy" that is used with adopted or foster children who have poor attachment with a parental figure. Similarly, a treatment technique known as a "trauma narrative" or "timeline" can also be detrimental to some kids if not completed appropriately and at the right time. Although CBT is a scientifically proven technique (that I really like) it can still be challenging (and even unhealthy) for some kids. This article will explore some common issues with different types of therapy and provide a video of Neil Feinberg, a proponent of attachment therapy, performing a "rage reduction session" with a client. We will also explore 5 types of therapy to reasearch and think twice about for adopted and foster children.
Do you have an adopted or foster child? If not, have you considered fostering a child or adopting a child? What is stopping you? What inspired you to do it? Whatever the case, adopting and fostering a child is one of the most difficult, intimidating, and humbling experiences for many families. It's also quite admirable. Adopting or fostering a child (or teenager) will take a great deal of support from your "village" and knowledge about attachment, trauma, and patience. Sadly, for many eager adoptive and foster parents, the idea of adopting or fostering a child often outweighs the potential downsides and challenges that come with raising an adopted or fostered child. Many families find themselves helplessly searching for support when their adopted or foster child begins to show signs of mental illness, attachment trauma, or behavioral problems. One of my previous families described it like this:
"I went to Uganda and adopted MiMa and she was the sweetest child I had ever seen. Once back in the U.S., she began to scratch me, bite me, hit and kick me, I didn't know what to do. Not only did we not bond, but she was developing behaviors I had never seen before. It was awful!"
Does this sound familiar? This article will explore the challenges often faced by adoptive/foster families and discuss 12 things that adoptive and foster children with mental or behavioral health challenges wish their parents knew.