Last weekend, my husband and I had a night away from the baby for the first time (she’s just past ten months).  Some parents have told me that seems so soon; for others, it seems incredibly late.  If we had local family, I’m sure it would have happened for us sooner.

In fact, we’d arranged an overnight trip four or five months ago during a visit from my mother, but our baby wound up making other plans: She caught a virus that caused her to spend four nights in the pediatric ICU (the PICU.)  We were never given any reason to believe she would die, though it was still a frightening and emotional experience.  To have some perspective: Our daughter was in the PICU, but she was far and away the healthiest baby there.

“We never have sex anymore,” my new client, the mother of an 11-month-old, tells me plaintively.  “Is that normal?”  Her husband stares at the floor like he’s waiting for a shot: Just let it be over quickly.

“That’s definitely normal,” I reassure them.

“And our conversations have gotten so boring,” she continues. “We don’t have time to really talk.  Or we’re too nervous to really talk.  We’re always on alert.  At any minute, we can get interrupted.  Our son will need something.”

“That’s normal, too.”  Is it ever.  Though my little interrupter happens to be a female, nearly ten months old, I know what my client is talking about.  Intimately.  I debate whether to share that with her.