bipolar momSo picture this: I am on my way to a doctor’s appointment three hours away, which requires a lot of back road driving. I had gone a different way because I had to meet a woman from the Boston Terrier Rescue, and had to use GPS to get myself back on track and to my destination.

With tears in my eyes and a very broken heart I just started driving, trusting the GPS on my phone to get me to my destination safely. After driving for a while, I snapped back to reality and glanced down to see when I will be turning next – in the middle of nowhere, miles from anyone and anything.

My GPS was frozen.

Instantly, I panicked. I pulled over into an old, abandoned church parking lot and started to get hysterical. I locked the doors and stared around waiting for something bad to happen. You know, too many horror movies about young woman lost in the middle of nowhere. Well, yeah, my anxiety was higher than it has ever been, EVER.

I started beating the crap out of my phone, restarting it, pulling the battery and restarting it again. Nothing worked. My GPS was a goner, along with my phone, which was almost dead and wouldn’t charge on the car charger.

That’s when I completely lost. I got back on the road and continued driving because I was too terrified to sit where I was to call someone to talk me through some sort of direction. I pulled my battery out of my phone and let it sit like that for a few minutes, while I continued driving. I had a basic idea of where on the map I might be (within maybe a 30 mile area) and started trying to do as my father has always said – trust my gut.

I began turning, driving and turning more. After about 20 minutes I finally got my phone to charge, but still no GPS. I called my aunt to try to see where I was, trying to tell her roads and such, while she was two hours away.

Still – nothing.

I was driving down two lane back roads and hadn’t passed a car for miles. I began having a terrible panic attack and had no choice but to get through it. I had to. I didn’t have the option to fall apart.

Then I saw it: a sign. A main road that I knew.

I did it!

I turned onto this road, and while I was unfamiliar with where I have been dumped onto it, I knew at least which way to go. Then I started seeing gas stations, food places and stores.

Ahhhh. I could breathe again. I felt okay.

I actually beat one of my most severe panic attacks ever, and I was able to breathe through it and use my mind to control the physical reaction to such a terrifying event. Now, what to do with this phone?

I got home and informed my husband it was time for an iPhone. I have been an Android kinda girl for two year, but after what this Android of mine did to me in a moment of desperate need, I figured it was time to break up with my Android and move to something more reliable. So I found an iPhone on Craigslist for a really good price, and I picked it up last night.

I am not playing with my phone anymore! That was just plain horrible.

Now, I hold my new iPhone in my hand and actually feel a slight sadness over giving up on my other phone. I had a good, solid relationship with my Android, but why on earth do I feel a loss, over a PHONE?! Sheesh, I am so ridiculous sometimes.

I told my brother, the biggest iPhone fan out there, that I had converted. He told me if I went back to my Android he would disown me. He was joking, of course, but also informed me it takes 21 days to make/break a habit. I will give it some time and see if I can manage without my Android.

As for now, I am still a little bit freaked out over my ordeal; you know, waiting for the serial killer to come snatch me out of my car on those long, empty, very scary roads.

Needless to say, I won’t be taking any road trips solo for a while. That was too much for me!

Panicked driver photo available from Shutterstock

 


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From Psych Central's website:
PsychCentral (July 26, 2012)






    Last reviewed: 26 Jul 2012

APA Reference
Anonymous. (2012). Let’s Talk About Panic: Lost, Alone, Two Hours From Home with No Help in Sight. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 1, 2014, from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/bipolar-mom/2012/07/lets-talk-about-panic-lost-alone-two-hours-from-home-with-no-help-in-sight/

 

 

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