Asperger Syndrome

Parenting Asperger’s And NLD Children: Using Help

Children with Asperger’s or NLD often receive help at school and outside school. They might see OT’s, psychologists, guidance counselors, special education teachers, and Speech and Language therapists, as a partial list, to help with anxiety, depression, social skills, sensory issues and motor skills, handling frustrations, and schoolwork. They often create behavior plans at home and school. I often see a team of people working with a child. What amazes me is that these people usually don’t communicate with each other, and often don’t communicate with parents in a helpful way.
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Asperger Syndrome

6 Tips For Getting Feedback With AS or NLD

It's a significant part of AS and NLD is that people miss the critical nonverbal cues that make up as much as 70% - 90% of social communication, so they can fail to know when to join, how to follow the "give and take" of a group conversation, and how to read the response to their own behavior. One way to get guidance is to self advocate - to explain the challenge and ask for feedback. This has its pro's and con's, and there are pointers that are good to know. First, the pro's. If you have AS or NLD, you don't "get it" when you're missing something, so being told to be more self-aware and “catch yourself” isn't helpful unless someone verbalizes what it is you’re supposed to catch. Having someone let you know social norms you might be missing can be very helpful. If you are worried that something is not right but aren't sure, you can ask for feedback. Each social group has its flow and rules, and deciphering them often needs actual verbal explanation.  The good news is that within a group there is consistency, so as you learn the unspoken rules, you can be more self aware of observing them. Now the con's: You have to be both very solid in your sense of self worth and non-defensive to take feedback, because it's usually criticism. If someone says you go on too long, or you aren't giving other people a chance to talk, that can feel embarrassing and even shameful. It's not hard to to fall into negative thinking like, "People think I'm annoying" and "People don't like me. " It's important to both believe and tell yourself that you're an OK person, you know you have a challenge picking this up, and that it's a good thing that people want to share this instead of excluding you. This is challenging if you, like most of people, have a negative emotional response to being criticized. The tendency of most people who feel embarrassed is to become defensive, and usually argue because of anger or withdraw because of hurt. Both of these defeat the purpose of getting feedback, which is to be able to participate more successfully.
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Asperger Syndrome

Does Being Different Or Aspergers = “Goody Two Shoes”?

Kris Jones and I are discussing the obstacles to his self fulfillment. The first we discussed was social anxiety; the second I’m highlighting is handling being different and rigid/black and white thinking. This kind of “all or nothing” thinking impacts the way that he relates well to friends. “Unlike so many in our society today, I feel that I hold myself to high principles. I have integrity and maintain my unique individualism despite what others think, but sometimes it's harder than what it seems.
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Asperger Syndrome

Asperger’s Syndrome And Handling Social Anxiety

I’m emailing with Kris Jones, an eloquent writer on Linkedin about his Asperger’s Syndrome. We’re talking about the stressors he experiences that can create extremely self-limiting anxiety. We’re going to use several blogs to talk about different stressors. Kris’s first stressor was his lack of self –fulfillment. One of the causes of this lack of self-fulfillment was Kris’ social anxiety.
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Asperger Syndrome

Are People With Aspergers/NLD As Logical As They Think?

Individuals with Asperger’s Syndrome (AS) and Nonverbal Learning Disabilities (NLD) take pride in being logical thinkers; for them, the points of view of others can seem illogical. If the person with AS/NLD dismisses others’ ideas, this is usually perceived by neurotypicals as stubbornness. What’s interesting is that often when people think they’re being logical, research shows that their emotions can be driving their cognition. Emotions are frequently strong influences in people’s thinking without their knowing it.
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Asperger Syndrome

Are Adults With Asperger’s Syndrome Forgotten?

People with Asperger’s Syndrome (AS) navigate the neurotypical world dealing with the same basic challenges they had as children, but there are relatively few practical and local support services available to them.

Accommodations aren’t made for adults. They can have sensory problems in over-stimulating environments, but the few accommodations made in ERs and theaters for children don’t include them.

Accommodations in school may have helped with inflexibility, concrete thinking and difficulty with changes...
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