Kids don’t generally develop anxiety disorders all on their own. Oh sure, genes and biology have some influence, but these factors largely just predispose kids in the direction of acquiring problems with anxiety. The wrong messages can push both anxiously disposed kids as well as otherwise normal kids in the direction of struggling with anxiety for the rest of their lives.
If you’re a parent or someone who cares about kids, you just might want to know what type of messages instill insecurity. I’ll start by laying out three common mistakes that parents make; in other words, the kinds of messages you “don’t” want to give them:
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Anxiety is a huge issue in todays world. My son has had great difficulty with this. Unfortunately it was his school that perpetuated this problem. The anxiety only getting worse with unfortunate life changes, a divorce. Then not being able to get help for him, he is now trying to deal with a hugs anger issue.
@Talkaboutkids issues: Sorry to hear that!
This is great advice. Many of the children I work with suffer from anxiety and it seems to me that it is becoming a bit of an epidemic. The answer lies with educating parents and schools and nobody is perfect- the things that our parents told us are often not the rigt things to tell the hyper-sensitive kids of today. Anyone who wants some info on using meditation with kids to help ease anxiety could check out http://www.rainbowcrystalconnection.com
It’s a great site with loads of good info up on meditation, breath work and mindfulness for parents and kids!
@Kerrie: Thanks for your comments.
Cheryl
2:29 pm on
November 3rd, 2011Great article! I have become interested in topics like this since reading “Mindset” by Carolyn Dweck, PhD. I have really learned the difference between constant praising of results compared to praising of effort. My husband and I had some anxiety issues with our twins who started preschool this fall. We’ve overcome their basic fears about school, and we’ve taken a different route in preparing our 2 year old to start preschool next year. Thanks for the info!
@Cheryl: You’re welcome! Thanks for your comments.
The key element that I see is parents protecting their children from all harm and rushing in to save their children. Children need to fail and learn to cope. Great post, thank you.
@Renee: Glad you liked it!
cerice upchurch
4:11 pm on
November 5th, 2011I have to say i am so guilty of this. I have 5 kids. I also have severe anxiety and phobia disorder. As a result of me parenting in extreme fear and anxiety they all have developed anxiety disorders and my 11 year old twins have experienced very little. I am trying hard to change my ways but i just dont know what is ok to let them experience and what is not. ugh 
@Cerice: These are difficult issues that many parents struggle with. Some find that a little therapy helps them deal with such issues. Good luck!
Thank you for this article. I will be sharing this with a few families on my caseload. In my experience, both in parenting and teaching students with anxiety issues, these are critical steps to supporting the child. Families are systems and we(parents and teachers) play an enormous (and sometimes unexamined) role in the messages we give our children.
Here is my related post:
http://30daysofautism.wordpress.com/2011/05/16/coping-with-anxiety-the-power-and-message-of-a-parents-response/
Leah
@Leah: Glad you liked it!
Kendra Smith
2:29 pm on
November 17th, 2011This drug has been a miracle for me. I’ve never been a nervous or a high strung kind of person until the last year. I thought I was going crazy and was afraid to tell anyone. I talked to my doctor, and he prescribed the Effexor XR. Started at 75 mg, and then went to to 150 mg. I feel normal again now.
Kendra Smith
Antianxiety-Drugs.com
I think your suggestions are vitally important steps for parents. Children mimic how we act and if we act anxious so will they. Perhaps we should take a step back and think about how we act around our children.
Parents can play a role in children’s life to take care of them and behave friendly with kids and understand the nature and provide best facilities to them.
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