I am a psych major in colege and for some reason I have it nailed in my brain that the compulsions that a person suffering from OCD perform have little to do with the original obsessive thought. Am I right in thinking this or did I go off track somewhere?

Hello Julie, Great question. Some compulsions are quite related to obsessions–such as obsessions about germs and compulsive hand-washing or cleaning. However, many other compulsions have little or no obvious relationships to their obsessions–such as compulsively counting to keep loved ones safe. All compulsions are attempts to reduce distress. Hope that clears it up. Keep on studying!

Is it possible for someone to act this way only if “triggered” like in a suddenly difficult relationship…or even have only some of this not a total overcoming disorder

Doctors have always said my wife has OCD, but she does not engage in rituals. I had never heard of OCPD before, but having read up on it this sounds much more like her.
The main struggle in our marriage is about her unbelievable standards of cleanliness. Everything is classified into types of cleanliness ‘kitchen clean’, ‘inside clean’, ‘outside clean’, ‘laundry basket clean’. Moving from one zone to another requires rigid handwashing. (There are many other things, like never getting a task completed, inability to make decisions, rigidity in views, lots of to do lists that never get done…).
She will not admit that there is aproblem and will not accept advice from medical practitioners or anyone, because the are ‘dirty’ and she would not accept advice from someone who does not adhere to her standards. We never have friends over, our kids don’t have playdates, all for fear of upsetting the cleanliness balance.
How do I get her to accept that there is a problem and that we do need help?

I think I may be one of these types of people…where do I go to get tested? and what will it involve? Please let me know. Thanks a million!

In some of my recent experiences with prepubertal children with OCD who have not accepted that they have a problem, they evidence some of the characteristics you describe for OCPD such as perfectionism, feeling only they can do something that will reach standards, being rigid, passive aggressive, and convinced that what they are doing is useful and productive rather than problematic.Is this just a reflection of their developmental level, or is this more personality based constellation likely to persist?

Laura,

Thank you for touching on OCPD.

From personal experience, OCPD can be a stealth PD not because the person is unaware, but because of the degree of functioning a person can hang onto — and needs to hang onto, to retain some confidence, initially. (Yes, it’s denial, but not oblivious denial.)

In the same way, though, OCPD has shades, just as other tendencies do. There is, in my experience, crossover between an ADD-related hyperfocus and perfectionism. I was diagnosed a generation before ADD as depressed, then as ADD, and now, on my own, I’m aware of longstanding links in my own patterns between hyperfocus and OCPD-like perfectionism. Until now, perfectionism just felt like a way of compensating for areas I knew I was already weak. (Example: erratic working memory -> lists feel like a positive, even “productive” response.)

In many instances, perfectionism can be tackled as an issue of making efforts to change lifestyle habits, rather than as a personality style. If I had been told, initially, that I was classic OCPD (plausible only if one never looked below the surface at other drags on me I’m working through), I might have been highly recalcitrant about that stigma. Think about it: It is a misleading label (too close to OCD) focused on stopping “mindless” behaviors rather than on treating the person as someone with full faculties trying to self-actuate and grow. In other words, to make OCPD streaks out as a matter of inflexibility or orneryness is a bit rash. The reported emotional volatility, for instance, can be an outgrowth of being very self-aware. The pressure the person is putting himself under to break out of his habits combines with the pressures that others are putting on him to do so. (Here too, you can see a big source of the reported crossover between OC and anxiety.) Anyone would love to change, but it’s hard as heck to achieve big, fast changes, and at a certain point, communication around these habits can become a deeply sore point.

Would you care to dig a little further, and elaborate on resources for overcoming perfectionism and OCPD — particularly recommended forums, authors, clinics, books?

@Tom: Sounds like quite a struggle. On the surface, this sounds more like OCD than OCPD,but it could be a mix or even something else. I urge you to see a therapist. That person could help suggest strategies you might try in communicating with your wife. A professional could also help you decide how much isolation and restriction on your family’s life you’re willing to accept. Even if your wife doesn’t agree to see someone, you should go for yourself and your family. Good luck!

@Jeremy: You asked if OCPD can be triggered by a difficult relationship. Well, the diagnosis of a personality disorder includes that these patterns of behaviors are enduring. They usually begin in late adolescence and continue. At the same time when people are under stress, they often show increased symptoms of one or more disorders. So, it makes sense that those symptoms (or tendencies) arise when faced with a difficult relationship.

@Trisha: Hard to say. However, treatment at a young age for the OCD may help prevent those characteristics from evolving into a full blown OCPD later. Mind you, no studies have really addressed the issue as far as we know. Bu kids usually show good responses to treatment and have significant ability to learn new patterns of behavior. So there are good reasons to be optimistic.

@Jasmine: Psychologists are usually the professionals that work with people who have personality issues. Make sure you ask if the person has experience with cognitive behavioral therapy. Try looking at the web site http://www.ABCT.org for providers in your area. Testing usually involves an interview and sometimes answering questions in a written format.

@Max: Thanks for bringing up some of the complexities of these disorders. You make great points. You might enjoy working through some of these issues with a cognitive therapist check out the http://www.ABCT.org for referrals. “When perfect isn’t Good Enough,” by Antony & Swinson is one good self-help book. Another is “The Feeling Good Handbook,” by David Burns. Good luck and take care!

I have a child that exhibits ocpd and in addition seems to have a “person”m as her obcession. and seeks often desperately to speak with or be with this person to the point that she seems totaly controlled by it. Is this unusual?

Without being able to see you child, I can’t make a formal diagnosis. You might want to see a mental health professions that can do that for you. See our blog on choosing a therapist. Lots of normal kids have imaginary friends…it’s all a matter of degree and how much time does this friend take away from real life. Hope this helps take care.

Drs. Smith and Elliott- Hi, abd thank you so much for all the info you have posted about ocpd on this website. I need some advice or pointers and will make a long story as short as possible. I was with ‘Jay’ for about 8 yrs approx ten yrs ago. Our relationship had many ups and downs and there was a significant age difference between us. I was pretty young. During that time, he was always pointing out my flaws in life functioning, thinking and opinions. He had large piles of papers and collections of stuff overflowing and was always lamenting not being able to organize or deal with the mess because of x, y or z. If I tried to help, I was criticized for the way I tried to help.If I didn’t do as I should, he witheld conversation, affection and intimacy. He ran into personal conflict troubles at work and managed to go on disability claiming job stress and injury. He had numerous outside relationships and then claimed it was me that wanted an open relationship so what was wrong with my thinking? I was away in college at the time, but not very far away. As I became more independent our relationship eventually broke down to a time where I ended it because I could not stand the stressors. Certain things happened after that point where I had to obtain a non-contact restraining order against Jay. My mother was dying of cancer at that time and he was continually attempting to contact my parents and me about my lack of being human in this matter. All was quiet for years. Approx 2 years ago I received a message from him on a social networking website. Like an idiot, I responded to it because he was expressing remorse for his actions and wanted to make amends and I am a sucker for the lost puppy. I have never seen him in person since, but emails back and forth were innocuous chat about life and the mundane until about a month ago when politics hit the topic list. We have diametrically opposed views on social politics and religion. I disagreed with a minor political view regarding the recession. What I got back was a very deeply hurtful commentary on how I am derelict as a human being and some very hurtful stuff about my character and my mother. Needless to say I responded. I did not attack back, but asserted myself with the fact that what he said hurt and I didn’t think I deserved his comments. He said God would punish me for my beliefs and presented me with a wealth of Biblical minutiae. At this point I don’t think I should respond back further nor has he responded to my comments back. I will admit I am being a “right fighter” in this because,dang it, I want him to say he is sorry and mean it tho I know he cannot. He did tell me at one point in the past his therapist told him he was either ocd or ocpd. He was at one point working on unloading his many collections of stuff with a dumpster out front. He has a chain link fence around his property and weeds obscure the actual house structure. He claims to spend much time working with a religious group helping the indigent and poor families. Jay berated me for not doing my civic duty in this regard and demanded I show proof I was helping the poor. I don’t know what to do with this-there is a part of me that is afraid of him because of what I went through with him and the court system ten years ago. We do not live in the same town- 30 miles away. In my research, I have found nothing to suggest that people with ocpd are any more prone to violence or other attacks than the general population. Through this online research, I find I have a lot of compassion for those who suffer from what this personality disorder brings upon sufferers. If I do get contacted again, how do I back out gracefully from this? I praised his good works for the community- it is such a good thing this very intelligent capable man does, but I feel any further contact with him would just simply not be a good thing for either one of us given his viewpoint and my anger at wanting him to apologize. Can you offer any advice or suggestions? Any help would be graciously appreciated! Sorry for the length of this post.

Hello Rebecca,
Wow that is quite a list of symptoms. Of course, we cannot diagnose people without seeing them in person. But, there are many red flags in your description of this person. Most people with personality disorders have more than one–if you are curious, google Personality Disorders and read the descriptions. The real question for you to think about is what do you hope to accomplish by explaining yourself or making a connection to a person that has hurt you in the past. I would suggest caution. Talking this over with someone such as a counselor might also be useful. Take care.