Under The Influence Of Violence

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo
Ana begging, Mexico

Ana begging, Mexico

“Our system is one of detachment; to keep silenced people from asking questions, to keep the judged from judging, to keep solitary people from joining together, and the soul from putting together its pieces.” ~ Eduardo Galeano, “Divorces”.

The photo here is of a woman I met in central Mexico. She is a street beggar. I will call her Ana. Begging, as well as panhandling, and homelessness are poorly understood. When people live on the margins others assume they know why and judgments leap into conversations.

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A Love Affair With Violence

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo

child_violence

“Human beings are like parts of a body, created from the same essence. When one part is hurt and in pain, the others cannot remain in peace and be quiet. If the misery of others leaves you indifferent and with no feelings of sorrow, you should not be called a human being.” ~ Sa’adi, thirteenth century Persian poet.

 Violence is a collective experience. If one suffers we all suffer. If enough violence permeates culture, society, families, and institutions the populace will become numb. Once this happens violence is free to metastasize.

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The Child That Wants To Hurt Others

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo

anger-child“The best fighter is never angry.” ~ Lao Tzu.

For the therapist it is not unusual to meet children who are angry. In fact, it is not unusual to meet children who want to hurt others. They use words like; “I want to kill”, “I hate him”, “I want him dead.” On one level it is shocking to hear tiny children speak with such force and conviction toward malfeasance. On the other hand I take to heart my job, which is to understand what this is really about.

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College Bound Anxiety

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo

Library-Books-300x199Library-Books-300x199“Where’d the days go, when all we did was play? And the stress that we were under wasn’t stress at all just a run and a jump into a harmless fall.” ~ Paolo Nutini.

Next month many thousands of students will be heading off for college to become part of the Freshman class. These seventeen and eighteen-year old youth will be leaving known environs of home, community, and friends. They are leaving their tribe and coming together in a geographic location where there are many unknown tribes with unfamiliar cultures.

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When Your Child Is Different

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo

Bullying“The nail that sticks out the farthest gets hammered the most.” ~ Patrick Jones.

Bullying is a flaccid word. It doesn’t capture the true essence of what really happens to children and adults when someone sets their aim on physically and emotionally doing harm. I prefer words such as torture, human rights violation, crimes against humanity, and inhumane treatment. Any time a life is attacked, denigrated, and a person is reduced to the confines of being an object we have a serious problem.

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Between A Rock and A Hard Place

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo

rock-and-a-hard-place“You’ll never find your limits until you’ve gone too far.” ~ Aron Ralston.

Therapy is a common place to find people definitely situated between a rock and a hard place. There simply are those times when neither choice is great or all choices have so many unwanted consequences. Let’s look at some of the rock and hard place situations that cause you and most folks considerable angst.

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The Practical Side of Love, Life, and Sharing

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo

about-us“The meaning of life is related to the quality of the relationships we have with others.” ~ Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo.

People are prone to relationship upsets. Sometimes they find themselves in quite a fix and feel depressed, anxious, overwhelmed, and just plain unhappy. Clearly, there are legitimate times for concern, however, many times the problem is more related to state of mind, unfinished business from another time, or phase of life. Let’s look at what happens to love and how it loses its practicality.

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How Not To Panic On The Curves

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo

sharp-curves-sign“When you come to a roadblock, take a detour.” ~ Barbara Bush.

What do you do when the distance traveled between two points is not in a straight line?

Ah, life’s little detours, curves, steep grades, and uphill climbs. Life can be likened to a most interesting and varied road trip. Parents lament when their teen or young adult finds him or herself in trouble with the law or with the abundant variety of drugs to numb whatever feels as though it needs numbing. How do you avoid the panic?

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Compassion Fatigue and The Professional: An Intervention

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo

doctors-without-borders-jonas“No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.” ~ Charles Dickens.

In my blog of the same title earlier this week we talked about compassion fatigue and the warning signs you might be at risk for this form of secondary traumatic stress (STS). Today we will look at how to intervene on your own behalf or on the behalf of a professional at risk.

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Compassion Fatigue and The Professional

By Nanette Burton Mongelluzzo

2dt9cax“Some days there won’t be a song in your heart. Sing anyway.” ~ Emory Austin.

Anyone who has ever cared for another during an illness, following a death, during a mental illness, drug addiction, or any of the many loss scenarios that exist understand that compassion will involve fatigue and stress.

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