Anger

Why do People Blame, Criticize and Intimidate Me?

Antagonism is a term used to describe attention seeking in the form of blame, criticism and intimidation. Since the antagonist is seeking our attention, it is up to us to resolve the interaction effectively. This means that we must use our adult judgment to determine what the reality of the situation demands and then muster the courage to respond in the real world, instead of merely reacting.

One of purposes in antagonizing is to build yourself up...
Continue Reading

Anger

Guilt Trip: Denying Your Mistakes

We may describe Mark as irresponsible, lazy, rebellious or stubborn. He won’t cooperate with us in accomplishing the routine tasks of everyday life. To him, everything is “boring,” and he must escape from this “boredom” into “exciting” activity or useless time wasting. He says to himself, “I am exempt from the burdens and responsibilities of life because I am special, unique.”

Continue Reading

Anger

Do You Think You Are Better Than Me?

We are all in pain to a greater or lesser degree, but most of us find our own way of working around it so that we can get on with our lives. However, our lives would be much richer and fuller if we could identify the pain of our insecurity and relieve it. Then we wouldn’t have to overcompensate any more. But that takes know how. It also takes time, effort and courage. In the meantime, we are in pain. We have had this pain so long that we cannot even feel it anymore, but it is down there just the same.

Continue Reading

Anger

Stop Damaging Your Relationship

How do you sort out antagonism? While anger is real and valid, his/her way of expressing it is counter productive. He/she is not encouraging us to help relieve his/her pain, it is driving us away. He/she is making us an enemy. He/she is not doing what reality requires. Since he/she doesn’t know what reality requires, he/she can only prevent, plan and seek to control potential, future pain and that is antagonism.

Continue Reading