Creativity often times drives me crazy, because I don’t follow the rules and I have some trouble staying in the lines.

When I was in grade school, I remember making a paper mache duck for my dad that only had one wing. People thought that was a bit odd but I thought my duck was cool, and just because by the time I got to the other wing I was ready to wrap up the project doesn’t mean it wasn’t artistically significant! Although I have to say the ridicule of my artistic abilities got to me a bit, and I started shielding others from my creative expression.

I’ve come to realize the benefit of art is that it allows you to express yourself creatively, and while people always judge art comes in all shapes and sizes.  Painting and paper mache may not be my thing, but I have found photography to be an incredibly rewarding experience – one that takes advantage of my quick mind and unique perspective.  And then I came across the best creative exercise for me yet – a manifestation board.

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I usually like to write productive, meaningful posts about ADHD. I try to keep it positive and be gentle and give suggestions on dealing with this puzzling brain disease. Not today. Today, I just want to rant a little about what this world is doing to my ADHD, with a few reminders on how I can keep afloat.

I’m simply overwhelmed with emotions. Fear, sadness, anger, hopelessness – you name it. It seems to me everyone is running around in circles, reacting to crisis after crisis, and yet the world continues on its downward spiral.

Wars, the environment, homelessness, anger, joblessness, natural disasters, on and on and on.  My mind is full to the brim  – but problems continue to be added and added – making my mind feel like a juggler forced to keep too many balls in the air.

Eventually they will all drop.

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I’ve been talking about the upside a lot – and I think it’s important for friends, family and coworkers to all realize there is a MAJOR upside.  There is also something that I think a lot of people would benefit from understanding, in terms of the downside.  And if people did, they could save a LOT of painful, ultimately pointless conversations and conflicts.

Just as the ADHD mind has the ability to go on and on, on positive subjects with new, creative, brilliant, juicy ideas…  the opposite can unfortunately happen as well.  If you aren’t careful and don’t understand this, you can end up making the situation much worse by engaging the ADHD mind instead of finding a way to end the conflict (or save it for another time). 

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If you still don’t believe there is major value to the disorganized, scattered, wayward way of the ADHD mind, let me share an example of how it works.

Now, this may not be the best solution ever for solving the gay marriage issue, but it’s something my ADHD mind came up with that I guarantee a person who thinks along logical, straight lines might never imagine.  Our minds simply work in different ways.

I came up with the thought in bed this morning, while reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s new book Committed, about the entire marriage concept.  She talks at length about why we get married, the failure rate of 50% that would never be tolerated in any other government run program, and our ongoing desire to ‘get married.’  It makes me wonder why on earth people don’t scrap this institution, and come up with a new one that works.

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I can’t tell you how many times I get to around 10 or 11am and think to myself, ‘What am I supposed to be doing?  I feel like I am running in circles!,’ only to realize that once again I have forgotten to take my ADHD meds.  It should not be that hard — I mean I take them every day, yet still somehow I manage to get through 5 or 6 hours of my day before realizing the mistake.

And then if I have therapy, well, what do I tell my doctor?  I can’t remember my moods yesterday, let alone a week ago.  How am I supposed to know what affected my moods throughout the week?

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I can’t begin to explain how hard it is at times for me to focus. To sit down, and get going on what I need to do. But when I do – look out – because I can do a lot to make the world a better place. Unfortunately, it’s so difficult to get to that place these days because there is an ongoing bombardment of distractions that seem to get greater by the day.

Research has shown that if you work in an office environment you get interrupted about once every 8 minutes.  And that it takes 4-5 minutes to refocus after an interruption.  And those are just studies on the general population!

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I always knew I assumed things, but not until a recent relationship did I realize the full extent.

There was SO MUCH misunderstanding going on and it absolutely baffled me.  I was being told on the one hand this person really cared for me and on the other finding all the evidence in the world to challenge it.

I was banging my head against the wall day after day after day trying to figure out what exactly was going on.

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I have been addicted to just about everything, and have quit these addictions because of one primary reason; I was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Granted, I found tools that worked and helped me along the way, but the thing that stopped the addiction wasn’t AA, a patch, advice from friends and family, or a divorce.  It was something inside me; a true exhaustion from the up and down of the addiction itself.

There are really no miracle cures for anything.  There are tools that can help you overcome challenges in getting there, but the only thing that can truly make you stop something is yourself.  And then by surrounding yourself with people and things that support that type of healthy vs. unhealthy behavior.  I do think it’s different for each and every person.

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Fine.  I am totally ok admitting it to the whole world.  I have an addiction to texting that try as I may, I cannot seem to beat.  I am admitting now I am completely helpless over it – and asking all of you to help.

Why?  Because there doesn’t seem to be many great solutions out there – and I find the best way to overcome something is to find someone else who has done it successfully and build on that.

We don’t have any NIH studies that show success rates of different treatments, so we need to join together and find solutions that work.

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Why is it that being called ‘crazy’ is so bothersome? It’s as if this one word cuts right to the core of our very being and makes us question our intrinsic worth. Yet what do we ADHDers do when someone calls us crazy?

We act crazy!

Crazy can mean all sorts of things; bizarre, fantastic, deranged, insane, or dangerous.  I, personally, am using it in regards to how we term ‘unpredictable’ behavior.  Often the word is thrown around, “You are acting crazy or that idea is crazy or did you take your crazy pills?!”  Something about it just sets me off.  People – call a spade a spade!  If I am acting in a way that scares you or seems out of character and unpredictable, tell me!

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