Go Ahead! Follow me @ChickADD44

Woh! Twitter is messing with my head! I’m trying not to be intimidated by all the super-smart, super-cool people who are Following me. I feel like my fly is down.

I’m trying to be conscious of my lifelong (pre-ADHD diagnosis) pattern of striving for a goal, approaching it, then abandoning same – LOOK! A tree! – through distraction, fear of failure, boredom, whatever.

So now I’m watching my Twitter list grow and feeling those old familiar feelings of shyness, inferiority, and social ineptitude. I’m resisting the urge to go hide in the basement and take my Tweets with me.

Remember when I said it takes me forever to learn anything new? I wasn’t just “whistling dixie” (as my mom used to say, whatever that means).

I’m on a warp-speed learning curve at the moment, and given how fast we put this webinar thing together, I’m actually pretty happy with it (and yes, kind of proud. At least you could hear both me and Melissa Orlov, my special guest, and that’s the main thing. That, and the info is gold!).

I also admit that I’m pretty proud that last night’s ADHD, Anger, and Marriage was not only mine, but Psych Central’s 1st-ever webinar. How cool is that?!

My guest, Melissa Orlov, was superb. I admire her calm, cool, and collected manner; her depth of knowledge and her warmth; she was the perfect choice as my first guest. (she even laughed at my jokes, bonus!)

Melissa and I will be presenting again on Thursday, May 24 @ 8 p.m. EST, details coming soon.

For those of you who missed last night’s webinar, ADHD, Anger, and Marriage,
here’s a link to the audio
I’m sorry there aren’t any spiffy visuals, but hey, I’m new at this! It was my maiden voyage, so please cut me some slack.

Webinar Thurs., May 10 w/Zoë Kessler and Melissa Orlov

I’m super-excited to be presenting a webinar this Thursday (May 10th) with author Melissa Orlov, whom I recently interviewed. When I spoke with Melissa, it was abundantly clear that she’s a wonderful resource, so I asked if she’d be interested in co-presenting with me.

Much to my delight, she said yes!

In classic be-careful-what-you-ask-for style, instead of working on my book tonight, I’ve spent 6 hours setting up the webinar (one of two we’ll be doing this month, unless I turn out to be so incompetent she dumps me!) using a platform I’ve never used before; writing the webinar description, e-mail notices and Tweets to let everyone know about it; re-sizing and cropping photos for same; updating my website pages; talking to Melissa; e-mailing Dr. Grohol here at Psych Central (we’re hosting it); and so on.

I’ve always loved to teach – and loved to learn.

Last Friday, I had a total, teary, ADHD adult-learner meltdown.

You’d think after blabbing and blogging about having ADHD for so long, I’d be ok with sharing that I learn more slowly than others. Not so, as my recent bass guitar lesson proved.

Today’s post concludes my talk with Melissa Orlov, author of The ADHD Effect on Marriage. These are just a few of the topics we touched on.

ADHD in a marriage is complex; to find out more, I’d encourage you to pick up her book, or attend her upcoming seminar.

Zoë:  Many people with ADHD earn less than their partners. This can create a power imbalance in a relationship. Can you address this?

Melissa Orlov, Author, The ADHD Effect on Marriage

Melissa Orlov’s Couples Marriage Seminar starts in exactly one week (on Wednesday, April 25th). I thought her book, The ADHD Effect on Marriage was fantastic, so I decided to speak with her to find out what her course was all about.

In addition to acting as a consultant to ADHD-affected couples, Melissa (who does not have ADHD) is married to an ADHDer.

Although we had a lengthy conversation, she had me at:

“If you have a therapist who is saying that your partner is a jerk… because they don’t understand ADHD, and they don’t understand that a person with ADHD can be very inwardly focused without any mal-intent at all, then it may or may not help.”

Without further adieu, let me tell you about her upcoming couples seminar, followed by an abridged version of our interview, to be continued tomorrow.

Zoë Kessler speaking at the ADHD Through the Lifespan Public Forum, with Dr. Timothy Bilkey, April 4, 2012, Barrie, Ontario, Canada

If I’m supposed to be getting paid to pay attention, I’m pretty sure my paycheck will be docked this week. Or at least that I’m on an apprentice’s salary because there’s no way I’m up and running just yet.

In this follow-up report to my April 3rd blog post, Solo Business Owner? Get Paid to Pay Attention!, I’m going to look for the positives in an effort to encourage myself to keep going.

Why? Because I’m still excited about Marilyn Strong’s approach, and I want to give it a fair shot. Quitting at this point would not only be premature, it would be unfair to me, to my business, and to Marilyn’s hard work.

The Ford Focus. I'll say no more.

Since at least 1993, research about the dangers associated with ADHD and teen drivers has been piling up faster than cars at the Indie 500. Even so, judging from a recent NY Times online article (Learning to Drive With A.D.H.D., by John O’Neil, March 26, 2012) it’s still news. Why?

I’m glad that the issue is getting media coverage. I’m disappointed that the association between ADHD and risky driving (especially in adolescents) isn’t common knowledge by now.

How many accidents, from fender-benders to fatal, might have been prevented had this info been made public when it was first recognized?

For the most part, O’Neil’s article is informative, well-researched, and encouraging. It might even save lives. That said, I was frustrated I couldn’t comment on it online, so I’m doing it here.

I was having a great day. Then, I sat down to fill out a form. It was a week overdue, but I called the company that was waiting for it, and bought myself more time.

Things were humming along grandly, then Whammo! I hit page two. Page two contained a line of legalese which meant nothing to me, yet I was supposed to check yes or no. Yes or no to a statement I understood about as well as I understood William Shatner in Incubus (shot entirely in Esperanto). It took three phone calls to find out that no one at the company wanting me to answer this question had any clue what it meant either.

“The writings and practices in The Now Effect don’t only come from my experience, but from the experience of thousands and thousands of people who have struggled with a whole host of life’s issues from stress and pain including anxiety, depression, ADHD, addiction and trauma.

Underlying the entire book is the aspiration to develop more playfulness with yourself and allow this to be a new adventure into your life.”

~ Elisha Goldstein, Ph.D.

Here at Psych Central we’re excited to congratulate fellow writer Elisha Goldstein, PhD, on the publication of his latest book, The Now Effect: How This Moment Can Change the Rest of Your Life (Simon & Schuster, Inc., 2012).

Dr. Goldstein, a clinical psychologist in private practice in West Los Angeles, writes a blog for Psych Central called Mindfulness & Psychotherapy.

As mindfulness meditation is seen to be an effective treatment for ADHD (when included in a multimodal approach), I decided to speak with Goldstein to find out if his latest book has something to offer those of us with ADHD.

Here’s our conversation (abridged for the purposes of this blog post).