ADHD Diagnostic Quiz for Women*
by Zoë Kessler, Certified, Bona Fide, Chick A-D-D
1) Do you play air guitar while crossing the street at a traffic light?
2) At age 50?
3) Did your boyfriend dump you for a woman who gets manicures and pedicures and has a regular paycheque? (Never mind where I got that question)
4) Do you have trouble remembering your best friend’s kids’ names? Your spouse’s? Your own?
5) Do you listen to Janis Joplin, loud, while using your steering wheel, dashboard, and gas pedal as a drum kit while speeding down the highway at 8:00 a.m.?
6) Is Martha Stewart incomprehensible to you?
7) How incomprehensible?
8) Are you often mistaken for a woman 15 years younger?**
9) Are the words, vivacious, charming, and bubbly often applied to you?**
10) Are your friends jealous of your energy?
11) Do you have friends?
12) Are you often late for work?
13) Do you work?
14) Do you refuse to let friends visit because your house is so messy?
15) Do you refuse to let your husband/wife1 in because your house is so messy?
16) Is your entire family standing outside your front door right now, banging on the brass door knocker while you’re frantically rushing around because your house is so messy?
17) Do you have trouble keeping up with the “Joneses”?
18) Who are the “Joneses”?
19) Are you directionally challenged? (Could you find the Joneses if your life depended on it?)
20) How did you find your way to this Questionnaire?
21) Do you remember what this Questionnaire is about?
22) Would you rather: a) gossip at a cocktail party b) balance your checkbook c) surf naked in Hawaii with Liam Neeson?
23) Are you easily taken advantage of? (HINT: if you have joined an average of 12 committees per week, have 20 volunteer positions, and are raising more kids than just your own, your answer is, “YES”)
24) Is it just as likely you’ll find your keys in your breadbox as your bread?
25) Do you make a grocery list before you go shopping, then forget the list at home?
26) Have you had sex in unusual places?***
27) If you answered, “Define ‘unusual’?” for Question 26 above, double your points.
If you answered YES to most (or all) of the questions above, and no to one or two, but I forget which ones – congratulations – you’re a Chick A-D-D!
*Please note: this Quiz is for entertainment purposes only. Absolutely NO scientific research or statistical relevance or anything very serious went into the making of this quiz. To get an actual diagnosis for ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), you’ll have to find a trained professional. Good luck with that.
**If you answered “Yes” to these two questions, you might be a cougar as well as an ADHDer. Which is no big surprise, given Thom Hartmann’s theory that those of us with ADHD are “Hunter” types, while the rest of the population are “Farmers.”
***This question is taken from an ADHD screening test developed for women by Dr. Timothy Bilkey, founder of the Bilkey ADHD Clinics and a psychiatrist who specializes in treating adolescents and adults with ADHD. I suspect his is a tad more accurate than mine.
1This is for my Canadian Chick ADD readers, who are allowed to have wives. Just one. Each. Unless they’re a man living in Bountiful, British Columbia (they don’t call it “Bountiful” for nuthin’…ew…don’t get me started…) in which case, why are you reading this anyway? Get your wives to read it.
For more information on women with ADHD, check out TotallyADD’s April blogs (April was dedicated to women with ADHD, or, as I like to call us, Chick A-D-D’s).
To see some famous women with ADHD (diagnosed by some other means than this Quiz, I can assure you), click here.
Kessler, Z. (2014). ADHD Diagnostic Quiz for Women*. Psych Central. Retrieved on April 27, 2015, from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/adhd-zoe/2011/05/adhd-diagnostic-quiz-for-women/