I've mentioned, maybe, that I'm getting my home ready to sell. You know, let subtle hints drop, maybe once … or twice. Well, you can't blame me for dwelling on it. I've lived here for over thirty years. I'm a bit attached, embedded so to speak. I've sunken into the cracks between the floorboards and the extraction is a bit painful. Additionally, I'm having the worst time organizing, orchestrating and sorting all my belongings. There is so much stuff one acquires over that length of time.
So, you know someone with ADHD. You've actually become involved with them. They're a friend. Maybe a good friend. Maybe this could become a relationship. But the ADHD thing has you a little worried. You aren't sure how that will impact this situation. And you also think you want to help, but you don't know how you could help … or even if you should help.
One of the words that we associate with ADHD is inappropriate. Sometimes the things we do and the things we say are exactly that. And that's a shame, because it makes us judge ourselves, question our value as colleagues and contemporaries, and as friends. And how does that inappropriate stuff slip by us, get past our guard? Well, it manages to do that by having some quality that we regard as being valuable. And we want to share that value. And that value isn't the inappropriate quality of the thing, it will actually be something else, something of value.
I'm serious. I'm thinking about this. I'm thinking this is something I could do that would be positive. And yes, I mean back on medication. Yes, I've been on medication. And yes, it did help. So now you're asking why I'm not currently medicated, right? Okay, some of you are asking that, and some of you may just be saying, “Who cares?” And some of you may even be screaming at your screens saying, “DON'T DO IT!!! Where to start ... lets start at the beginning. When I was first diagnosed, my diagnosis came with a recommendation that I be given a prescription for Methylphenidate. You'd know it by its more common name of
I don't feel as out of place now as I used to. It's true that before my diagnosis I used to just assume that the feeling of not really belonging was something everyone had, but I still had that feeling. Presently, I often feel that way still, but there are places where I can forget about it easily enough. Since the changes to my life that have occurred in the last eight or so years, I've found several sub-communities that feel like they are made of people like me. Some of those communities acknowledge the ADHD among us. Informal support groups like those that spring up on
Having ADHD is like being normal, 'cause for me, it is normal. I've never been any other way. To me, people without ADHD are the oddballs. No offense, but from where I sit, they're really quite strange. I mean, really, how can you live with a brain that moves that slow? It's like it must be stuck in low gear or something. And then they're always stopping to think. How does that even make sense? “Let me stop and think about that for a minute ...” Really? Stop what? Thinking? I say, “Let me think about that, along with everything else I'm currently pondering!”
We've been through this before. ADHD is caused by a slowing down in the development of certain parts of the brain. This “slowing down” in development means that the individual takes longer to develop fully. In the case of Adult ADHD it means that the development of the affected areas of the brain never is completed. Development is arrested at a level that leaves us … well, it leaves us with Adult ADHD. Now, In light of this, how is it possible that there are people out there claiming to have “The Cure” for ADHD? Well, they're out there making that claim because there are people who do not want to believe that they are irreparable.
If you don't have ADHD, then you may not know these things. But that's okay, I'm going to tell you, then you will know. You may think that ADHD is being absent minded. That's not true. Our minds are never absent, they are always present, they just like to be present in way to many trains of thought. We can't help that. You may think that we have too many things on the go. That's not entirely true either. We do try to multitask, even though nobody can multitask really. Not even computers truly multitask. They do what everyone does, they allot slices of
I knew this was going to be hard. I knew it going in. I psyched myself up for it, charged my mind, prepared myself. Or so I thought. I'm quite sure that it would have been much worse if I hadn't, but I'm wondering if I could ever have made myself completely ready for this. And I'm not talking about moving. I haven't sold my house yet. Haven't even listed it yet. No, we're in the “staging” … er, stage. And I'm stressed; yep, I'm stressing about the dressing. The house, my house, is great. But the art of staging, as I understand it, has more to do with leaving everything, or as much as possible, up to the imagination without making the place look vacant.
Sometimes things go wrong with computers on the internet. Sometimes it's a problem with the computer and sometimes it's a problem with the internet service. We call problems with the computer, “client side” issues. Internet service problems are “server side” issues. Sometimes things go wrong in life for people with ADHD. When the things that go wrong originate out in the world and get dropped at our feet, we could call that “server side” issues. When the things that go wrong are caused by ADHD symptoms, that is most definitely “client side” issues.